Rie Pie*

Random things I will never understand...

2011-12-08T14:34:00.000-08:00

Adding water to soap
This does not make more soap. IT MAKES LESS SOAP PER USE. If you have skimmed every plastic piece of it's gooey cleanliness, it's time to get more soap.

Men
Cold case.

Pinterest
I love you but I will never understand the allure of people pinning things they would like to do, and yet, never do them.
Why do I keep coming back to you?
Because you give me a hope of things I want even though they are not apart of my current life.
*same answer applies to the subject of men.

The Inheritance Cycle
This book series is BORING and so hard for me to get through without comparing it to LOTR. Dear Chris, you are very talented for writing these at such a young age. Dear Readers, have you not seen the resemblance between LOTR and these books?

Twitter
You are lame!! You are the attention seeking drama that is my least favorite part of Facebook.

The impolite cough
I hate that I can't excuse a cough. I can sneeze, say excuse me, and it's pardoned. Coughing just seems to be a begrudged acceptance from everyone.

Hoarding scents
Why is it that we are always restocking on soap, shampoo, and conditioner, but we all have the unlimited supply of perfume. If we are not using them, we probably shouldn't keep buying them.

People
Wash your hands, let others pass you in traffic, clean your house, and be kind to people.

Seriously.

Optimistic during opposition

2011-11-16T16:01:00.001-08:00

For me, happiness doesn’t come naturally, this is a choice. I’m learning how to do it as I go, but I thought I would share some of the reasons why I decided to take better care of myself, to learn to love myself, and to only allow myself to invest in those that can give me a healthy relationship (whether it’s work, friend, social, romantic, family, etc…). I control my happiness; no one else really has a role in that. Yes, it’s true that others can make you feel all ranges of emotions from the best to the worst, but I control who I spend my time with and how much power I can give to others.
About two months ago, my roomy Annie and I were talking about how to be happy. We both shared some experiences on how we came out of a trial feeling happier than when we went into it, but I had absolutely no experiences that I was able to find the positive side during a trial. My life, just like everyone else’s, has been hard. I told Annie that the only way that I thought I could find happiness and stay happy was for me to be defensive against the things that hurt me. I had to defend the things that made me happy. I had to completely fight against the things in my life that brought me down. I had to arm myself with goodness. I started studying about the Armor of God. I started to pray for happiness. I started to beg, in sincere and righteous wanting, to have a special spirit to be with me so I could become an optimistic person. That week of asking, studying, and wanting goodness to fill my heart opened so many new ways of thinking for me.
The next week Annie asked me to teach a class on ‘How to be Optimistic during Opposition’ for a service week with the singles in our Stake. We both knew the reason why she thought I should teach this. We knew that I needed to study it. Studying for this topic has been such a rebirth in my emotional state. This topic has been very tough for me to study because; 1. I didn’t have a testimony of finding joy during trials, 2. I feel as though I have been barely staying above water in my life, and worst of all 3. I still didn’t think that I deserved to feel at peace. I prayed for that patient spirit to coach me through this.
When I started to study, I looked up numerous talks on trials. This was interesting to me because my focus automatically went to the burdens and how to deal with them.
I was talking to my friend Amanda about my medical issues. I had just found out that there was nothing the doctors could do for me but give me medicine to help with the pain, not even a resolve or temporarily take away the pain, but to try to find something to help it. Painful spinal injections did nothing. Physical Therapy only strengthened my financial debt. In a white cold doctor’s lab, my spinal surgeon told me that they would be unable to operate because I had such extensive nerve damage, that it damaged my muscles. I will always have a paralyzed extension in my right leg. He also told me that my spinal issues will branch off and cause other problems in my body. It could affect my hip movement, my bladder control, my sexual organs, my reproductive organs; my other leg, flexibility and movement in my back…but these were “highly unlikely”. In another visit he told me that my nerve damage may heal within the next year, but that was also unlikely.
The fear and loss of hope in gaining my strength back I felt in that moment had me weeping. I was lucky that Annie showed up at the end of the appointment, because she was able to ask all of the questions that I was begging to know. I’m also glad that she listened, because I couldn’t. My thoughts were screaming. I felt as though I had lost a future that I wanted so much, a family. I would forever feel trapped in a body that looked like a monster. I already have such bad weight problems that men will never feel attracted to me, but now I felt permanently damaged.
Who could love a creature like me? Who would take care of me if I got sicker? How could anyone not think of me as a burden? What friends would stick by me when I am such a freak of nature? I was terrified. I was so alone. When I left the doctor’s office I cried in the parking lot for a few hours until I could see the road.
I hated myself. I hated everything that I was. I hated everything that I thought I would never have in my future. A while later when I could open up about things, and I was talking to Amanda, I told her about my fears. I felt left behind. I felt as though I was slowing down and the whole world was speeding up. She told me, “Heavenly Father would only slow you down so he could make sure that you see things more clearly. This is a gift.”
That night in my prayers, I thanked Heavenly Father for the gift that he had given me, I asked for his help in seeing what was trying to show me. With a heart broken, tear streaked face, I fell asleep.
The next morning I remembered what Amanda said, I remember the spirit I felt during my prayer, and I put it to the test! I choose to let my guard down on everything good and allow myself to give up the things in my life that bring unhappiness. I am normally such a control freak, making this was such a hard thing for me to do.
When I started to study for my lesson, I was seriously taking note of my trials. I had a list of the things that I found the hardest to get through in my life.
When I looked at this list I realized how much I hated myself for this. I felt disgusting and alone. I knew that I was unlovable. I felt embarrassed by the lack of beauty I had to offer. I was damaged. I am damaged. I felt as though only someone abusive could give me attention.
Then, with the kindest and most gentle whispering from the Holy Ghost, I felt his words warm my heart. I felt these comforting words, “None of these were your fault or choice.” I felt peace, my thoughts slowed down. I was calm. Then another thought came to me, “What you do with all of this IS your choice.”
It is my choice. I own me. There are things in my life that I can’t control, but there are things that I can. Life is too hard to surround yourself with sadness. Love is too heartbreaking to put your hopes in someone that doesn’t yet know how to love. The church is too right to not use my time wisely and weave myself into its teachings. Family is too eternal to not love them. Friends of quality are rare and should be treated as gems. I needed to make an action plan so I would never feel unlovable and worthless again.
These are the reasons why I made the action plan below:
-I started to study blessings. Happiness. Joy. Love. Family…
-I started to pray with an open heart. I started to read my scriptures every day. I started putting church attendance as my top priority.
-I made an appointment with my bishop. I have been living so close to that line of sin for way too long. I kind of lead my life like “I want to be good, but I don’t need to be that good.” I realized that is how people were lost in the “mists of darkness”. Life is dark when you are not focused on the light of the world! Talking with my bishop was embarrassing, hard and I felt as though I have been in those offices way too many times for me to feel “light” again. But I did. Before I even left his office, I felt peace. I KNEW that I was doing what made Heavenly Father Proud. There really is no peace without keeping our promises to our Heavenly Father. We cannot be happy without the atonement. We cannot feel our worth before we become worth something in the eternities.
-I make sure that I take my medicine every day. I have a chemical imbalance, but it’s my choice if I want to feel that way or if I want to feel balanced. I prefer balance in my life. I prefer not to be in pain, whether it is spiritual, mental, or physical. Pain? No thank you!
-I have started to lose weight and become more physically healthy. Even if I am handicapped, I refuse to make things harder on myself. I’m down 26 lbs. It’s slow, but steady!
-I asked all of my family to be there for me. I told them it was ok if they couldn’t, but I needed their help. They are all becoming healthier. We lost over 100 lbs together. They have helped me with doctor’s appointments. We spend more time together. I am learning who they are and loving them. I am letting them in my life. I make sure that my time is spent with them when we both have it available.
-My friends that I hang out with love me. I know they do. They support me. They accept me for my flaws, they wait for me when I fall behind, and they help me smile naturally. They know that I love them and they accept that love. It’s not awkward. It’s perfectly equal.
-I don’t hang out with those that don’t love or respect me. If I feel as though I am being used, I cut off their supply of my time. I stopped investing in those that still don’t know who I am. I want to be known. I want others to see my worth. I am lovable, and if they can’t see it, that’s ok. I’m just not wasting myself or my time on those that can’t appreciate who I am.
-Every morning I wake up and I think ‘Today is going to be a great day’. It works. I even have a motto that I say to myself when I start to doubt my new life. It’s in the heading of this letter, “be calm, love on’. Slow down, open up. There is nothing in this world that is good that isn’t worth sending love its way. I was so afraid of LOVE. It seemed like the worst four letter word out there. When people said it, it seemed like a double edged sword, but it’s not. It’s beautiful. It’s kind. It’s simple.
-Every day in my prayers I am grateful. I share my happiness with my Heavenly Father.
That helps most of all!
I’m learning to fall in love with myself. Not in the conceded way, but in kindness. In the details. In the flaws. In the strengths.
I really do love my life. I’m so thankful for it. I am so blessed. I want to thank those that never expected me to be anything but what I am. Rie. Just Rie.
Happiness waits for everyone to find it. I’ve found that when you follow the above, things become more balanced. Things slow down. But in those times of doubt, if you need to borrow my life raft of ‘be calm, love on’ please do.
I was so grateful to study the subject of optimism but I was nervous, everything that I learned for this talk was so personal, I had no idea how I would actually share it. Interestingly enough, my class was cancelled. There was not enough time for my course to be added in the schedule. I felt a wave of relief. I felt blessed for being directed in this subject of study; because with out being asked to learn about it, I would have never have done it on my own.

25 reasons

2011-11-11T17:18:00.001-08:00

(Ultimate Goal Weight)
I have been going to weight watchers with my sisters and my Dad's wife Betty. Overall we have lost over 125 lbs together!! I have lost 31 lbs and I am feeling very motivated to lose more! Our Wednesday night teacher talked to us about a friend of hers that wrote down 25 reasons why she wanted to lose weight. Our teacher said that these reasons helped her friend to get to her goal weight. I want to get to MY goal weight so I thought I would take that challenge as well to have a nice reminder. Here are my reasons:
-I want to be able to play with my nephews more actively. I love being known as fun Auntie Why. I love giggling and chasing and tickling and playing with my 5 gorgeous nephews. Reading, snuggling, and games are all good, but I want to be active with them.
-I want to own and wear clothes that are actually my style. When you are my size, style is more of a desire than a reality. You choose the clothes that fit. You choose the clothes that fit and are the right price. You choose the clothes that fit, are the right price, and what is available in the stores. That really limits what I can buy. I love tights and sweater shirts and dresses. I love knee-high boots. I love horizontal stripes. I love cute underwear. All of these loved treasures are not really in my reach right now.
-Shoe size goes down when weight goes down, not always, but some of the time. I’m hoping that I drop a shoe size when I drop most of my weight. There are not many adorable size 12 shoes in the world that are not made for men or very old ladies.
-Swimming season. Enough said.
-I want to own a LTB. Literally a Little Black Dress. Obviously, Little Black Dresses don’t come in plus size.
-Improve my relationships with my friends. Things like travel, sports, the great outdoors, camping, and all of the other things that would be so much more comfortable if I was healthier.
-I want to feel as beautiful as this girl looks!

-I want to breathe easier!! I hate climbing stairs and being out of breath when I get to the top. It’s so embarrassing walking with friends and I start breathing heavily. I hate that when I’m working out, I try to stifle my breathing so people don’t look at me with those “pity eyes”.
-I care about myself! I want to feel happy, beautiful, feminine, and powerful. I deserve that.
-I have never been photographic. I’m sure that if I lose weight that will help me feel more comfortable in front of the camera. PS. I have untagged many-a-facebook-photos.
-I love traveling. I love flying. I HATE asking for a seat belt extender. It’s the worst!
-Right now I walk around with a cane, if I lost weight, It would help me get around easier. Hopefully without one…
-My mom. I want to be healthier. I want to grow old and love life. I want to be involved with my family as long as possible. I want to show her that I am trying to have the best life I can.
-Self esteem. I just want to feel better about who I am. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I think, “This is not me”.
-Being over weight is hard on your body! I want to hopefully take less medication. Less pain killers, less anti-depressants, and less pain management…LESS CO-PAYS.
-I want to be able to exercise and not just painfully get through physical therapy.
-To never see “those looks” again. I hate that everywhere I go judgmental eyes follow me. Children ask overly-honest questions out loud, people in restaurants judge my every bite.
-Judge as you may…(but please see above) I want fake ninnies!! I have had “C” cups since 5th grade. I want some nice ones that fit me the way I want them to fit me.
-I want to have more romance in my life. Dating more, borrowing a gentlemen’s jacket when it’s chilly, and snuggling up under a blanket with a beautiful fellow without feeling insecure...
-Temple Service, sometimes it’s uncomfortable for me. I want to be able to go and serve without all of the unneeded hassle of my weight.
-I want to be more attractive to men. Real men. Kind ones. Ones that see how beautiful I am inside and out. The good guys are worth being healthy for.
-I hate feeling like I’m intruding on someone else’s comfort. It’s the worst when you can’t scoot over on the couch any further than you already have, same with movie theater chairs, restaurant booths, etc…
-To just be happier. Being healthy is an easy way to bring happiness into your life. It never fails.
-Once my sisters, Betty and I hit our goal weights…we are going on a cruise. OPA!!
-To prove to myself that I can do this!!

Lame back and whatnot

2011-10-21T13:26:00.000-07:00

There are so many times that I feel like I’m losing the things that are most important to me but I forget that I am given so many other blessings in its place. I have been fighting against every medical issue I have been having for the past year and it’s just leaving me exhausted and heart broken.

I was focusing on things in my future that I cannot control and forgetting about the blessings I have in my life now. I’m praying that I can start telling the difference between what is important enough to keep in my life and what I can get rid of.

I have been working with a pain management doctor and he wants me to start getting epidurals! That seems so ludicrous to me. I’m really hoping that they will actually help, because I’m running out of options to get rid of the pain.

I also pray that if they don’t I will be able to let it go.

I’m scared. I’m tired of feeling weak. I’m drained from fighting a battle I have no control over. I need to put it in the Savior’s all-knowing hands - I am trying to wait on the Lord. I am so grateful for the atonement. My daily life has, for some reason, forgotten to include it.

I am so thankful for being able to remember that I have that sound tool to use when I am either not in control or shouldn’t be.

Get Served.

2011-10-21T13:24:00.001-07:00

Guess what!

I got a new calling in my ward. I am very excited about this! I used to be over the Relief Society activities and I had no co-chair, no board, and no room to do the activity in and basically zero attendance. It goes with out saying that I was becoming very frustrated with the way my calling was working out. But, lo and behold, I will now be doing a calling that I think will work just swelling for me. I am over setting up service opportunities for the sisters in our ward. There is no designated day for it, no criteria to follow, no one to try to sync up schedules with, and no one to try to please besides those we serve. I am so grateful for this opportunity! Service really makes everyone’s lives better! Especially with the holidays coming around the corner; there seems to be more softened hearts willing to help and more people being open to receive help.

I am really humbled that my ward created this calling for me. I feel like this is something I can flourish in. I also think this will be an awesome way to bond the Relief Society together. I’m sure you will hear all of the dorky little things I will think of in getting the girls to be involved.

Any ideas?

The Memory of Zombie

2011-09-08T13:26:00.001-07:00

You should try this on your blog page too. What you do is take a random word and make a list of memories or things that you think of when you hear the word. Today my word choice is zombie.

The walking Dead is an awesome post-apocalyptic zombie tv show that stars survivor Rick Grimes, a sheriff deputy, who tries to save a small group of survivors that include his wife, son, and best friend. I own the first season and I LOVE IT!! The second season starts on Halloween and I cannot wait to see it. It is one of my favorite shows and the makeup is really amazing. The plot is even good, which goes against the normal zombie-cheese-fest criteria that most zombie plots follow. (It doesn't hurt that this show stars one of the hawties from the film Love, Actually.)

I have some weird obsession with the zombie. If I had to be a classic monster, zombie would be at the top of my list. I love them. I find the metaphors for them to be limitless. I love that you can take the monster and make them funny, terrifying, sad, or even on the rare occasion relatable. Sometimes I’m overly tired. Sometimes I’m so hungry that food is my only thought. Sometimes all I want to do is fit in with the masses. Sometimes I feel brain-dead. Zombies – I get it.

Woot.com has a daily deal that is normally a very good price. Every day their deal changes and it is only sold with the limit of product that they have on stock. Woot.com also has a t-shirt-woot. Local artists sell their shirts for one day and coming off the profiteer or the person stuck with a few hundred t-shirts in their design. Their shirts are my favorite things to look at. Most are very witty and creative. This one has been a favorite of mine for a while.

Michael Jackson’s Thriller. Pure genius. Need I say more?

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (spoiler alert) may have been a best-selling novel, but the story/writing was nothing to write home about. I did however read it, and love the little pictures that are drawn throughout the book. Yes I am bias because of the zombies that it definitely puts on display, but I also really appreciated the fact that Mr. Wickham was left at the end of the novel, legless and eternally attached to his zombie-bride Lydia. An ending that Jane Austen most likely would have never agreed to, because she is a lady, but I think in her heart of hearts she would have given a nod of satisfaction to the dirt-bag’s ignominious end.

The Zombie Walk downtown. October 25th is Zombie Day and there is normally a Zombie walk somewhere. You dress up and you walk. There isn't much to the event. They normally have a map that you can follow and then people normally hang out at various spots; clubs, Diners, Walmart...

Resident Evil and The Clock Tower. Both are Play Station games that are chuck-full of murderous attacks, creepy music, and hauntingly graphic zombie creatures. I could never play the game because it made me too nervous to actually succeed. I normally sat on my friend Jenny’s couch, holding a pillow close to my face, and watched in terrorized awe as she passed level by level.

Face-Off is a reality tv show where special effect makeup artists compete to be given a very prestigious career and paycheck. Each episode is interesting even to a person that doesn’t really care about that kind of thing, like me. They really are artists. My roomy Logan has a dream to be in special effects make up and she specializes and makeup and prosthetics. Right now she is making a mask mold for a zombie clown. I hate that thing. It is the creepiest creation she has thought of in that very mysterious, yet creative, mind of hers. Logan is a natural talent with these kinds of things. I hope she gets all she desires in a career.

The song Zombie, by the beloved Cranberries, is loved by many. I fell in love with the lyrics that seem to desperately cling to your bones. The bitter-sweet distress of love and war are encrusted jewels that decorate the lyrics of that beautifully written cry. If you love that song you should check out Jay Brannan’s cover. I’m not really a fan of this semi-pitchy singer, but his covers are really brilliant.

New additions

2011-09-05T13:45:00.000-07:00

The fall season is near and besides the promise of beautiful scenery, comfortable clothes, and awesome sleepy nights when my room is actually cool from the night air, it also has brought some unexpected additions to my life. I have invested in some lovely toys, luxuries, and gadgets that are making my life more comfortable and enjoyable.

I bought a bed. Hallelujah!!! It's a queen-sized comfortable bit of a heavenly cloud that I float upon every night (and sometimes during a daytime nap) into a beautiful, rest-easy, peaceful sleep.

My bed has become the new hangout spot in my apartment. We have recently gotten rid of a television that took up way too much room in our small living room and wasted hours upon hours of needed time to do something else that may actually help me progress in life. It seems that we now waste hours in my bedroom; talking, watching movies, or listening to music on my awesome bed.

Speaking of music...I finally started using iTunes. I cannot believe how long it took me to find a true romance with that exquisite piece of technology. ITunes has become my new obsession…and money pit.

I got a new desktop and desk at a very reasonable price from the ever-monopolizing Wal-Mart. I have a secret, I love Wal-Mart! I know that I’m supposed to hate it, but I can’t, not when it brings so many great toys into my life at prices that I can actually afford…or excuse. With the luxury of owning a desktop my writing has already taken flight and I have started printing chapters of my novel to be edited and reviewed.

My book is something that I want to share with the whole world through publishing so it seems so odd to me how protective I am of my little chapters that are being viewed for the first time. I love them. They are very personal to me. I’m worried that they will not be received well. Either way, It’s the next step and I’m moving forward.

Opposition has also reared its ugly head in the changes of the season.

Two weeks ago I found out that there was nothing that can be offered to me medically and that I need to wait another year to see if my nerve damage will repair itself. Surgery is not an option. Waiting is mandatory and not even a guarantee. I have been having a rollercoaster of emotions about this. The 5 stages of grief have been very prominent in my life since that day at my neurosurgeon’s lab #12, when I sat on a crinkly paper-covered medical bed and sobbed while my angel roommate asked all of the questions that were running through my mind, but I couldn’t choke out. My emotions have been so out of control with this and I have found myself questioning many things in my life. My faith has been wavering in the quality of my future, with normalcies, with dating, with someone being able to love me, with marriage, with children…I have been hanging on though because I know that eternal blessings won’t be held from me because I have a lame leg.

I lost 6 complete chapters to my novel. Amongst finding this out I had many un-ladylike words that flowed out of my mouth and many unneeded tears that came from an angry and exhausted mind. That was a low blow.

The changing of the season has also brought some loneliness. I have missed some friends in my life that have very obviously moved on. I pray that I can move on soon. This part has been the hardest pill for me to swallow. It’s so hard for me to see that someone else’s caring doesn’t reflect my failures or successes.

With the scales equally level holding good and bad changes, I have found that life goes on. My book is flourishing and growing into a strong work of art. My bed has comforted me after a long day of tears and also supported me after a night of laughter and adventure. Music…music, I cannot express my love for the music that has been surrounding my life with its wonderful bounties. It nourishes my soul and I think has been the most healing cast that I have ever used.

As for writing, it is something that I want to do for the rest of my life. It will always be there for me. Writing and I are endlessly attached to eachother.

bed side bad manners

2011-08-12T16:02:00.000-07:00

I have been in and out of doctor’s offices, labs, and special practitioner’s offices all over the valley since last November. Its exhausting going from place to place and trying to remember everything that you need to bring or try to persuade another office to fax to the current location you need it at. I found out quickly that I need to make copies of everything possible so I could have it on hand or at least call someone before my appointment took place to make sure they had access to what they needed. Amongst my cane, that I have to bring with me everywhere, I have a list of items I carry around with me to each appointment.

Of those items is an eight pound binder, full of paperwork and analyses, is one of the many joys I haul around. Juggling a cane, a purse, the loathed eight pound binder (that I cradle to my chest like a baby), a mri films folder (that is as big as tv-dinner table tray), a placard with a time limit on it for parking, and my shaking debit card; held out reluctantly for the next abusive swipe through the very number-crunching-addictive key pad that demands my $40 co-pay for each appointment…even if they are in the same building…on the same day.

Though the painful testing, the restless nights full of questions, and the slowly growing bowl of knowledge that is passed from doctor to doctor like a party-mix, I find that there is something that is constant amongst the ever-changing procedures and unfamiliar hypotheses that I hear though out my visits, and that is the repetitive statements that are used by everyone in the doctor’s office no matter if they have met with you a hundred times or the first time when they pass you in the hall. I have a sneaky suspicion that there is a little man running around the office holding que-cards or speaking into a secret two-way-radio, giving the workers the same lines to say over and over.

There are things that I don’t want to hear when I go in for an appointment and yet they are the things that I hear numerous times no matter where I go. I’m sorry that I have to share them, because they are annoying, but I fear that if I don’t jot them down they will circle in my head, on a skipping repeat, like a broken record playing a Nickel Back song. (Which of course sounds the same from start to end anyways.)

I now type down some of the monotonous statements that crawl under my skin, hoping that they will be removed permanently and the little guy holding the two-way-radio will know that I’m on to him. Well little man, I am onto you! Please be more creative in the future than sticking with the following:

Please have a seat; we will be with you in a minute.
This may hurt.
Are you able to walk?
Who is your insurance again?
I’m sorry, I’ve been running late today.
Our machine broke this morning.
Please fill this out.
Please fill this out again.
We lost the paperwork.
I’ll need a copy of their papers before we begin.
You have so much damage we don’t know where to start.
I will need a copy of that.
Have you already had__ insert a test the doctor gave me last week here ___ test?
You will have to meet with Doctor__insert anyone else here___before you meet with me.
We will need you to have a follow-up appointment with me.
Does this give you more pain or less pain when I poke you?
You have a lot of weakness…that is just not a good sign.
This does not look good.
Do you remember any trauma before this happened? Any at all?
Your reflexes are not good.
Well that’s no fun, is it.
I need you to sign here.
Which leg is it again?
We are going to need to reschedule.
I’m going to advise that you see another doctor.

And last but not least…
It’s good to see you again, (doctor looks at my name on the folder of freshly copied documents) Sahara, what is troubling you today?

sleep tight...and confined

2011-08-12T14:32:00.000-07:00

For a creating writing class, back in high school, we were asked to write a structure poem. We needed to place the words in our poems in very distinct patterns so the form of the poem matched the expressions in your poem. I wrote this:

Uncomfortable

IHAT

ESLE

EPIN

GINA

SLEE

PING

BAG!

Last spring I moved into a new apartment, with new roommates, and a new bedroom that made Harry Potter's under the stairs cupboard look like a master suite. I decided that I had to downgrade from my queen sized bed to a single, allowing some floor room to walk around.

I am a 27 year old women. I am a large lady. I am a 5'9 taller than average female. I sleep with pointed toes hanging off the bottom of my mattress and the tip of my head hanging off the top. I am also a sleeper that dares not to have any toe, knee cap, finger, or arm hang off the bed, into the vast dark abyss of the bedroom where the bedtime creatures could grab me, so all night I am confined on a 3'x6' cushy coffin.

I hate sleeping on my bed. It is uncomfortable and suffocating. I am trying, so badly, to afford the queen sized Malm bed frame and mattresses from IKEA. I dream of the leg room. I yearn for the movie nights, to be able to snug up with someone else. I crave being able to sleep with an elbow above my head without hitting my funny bone on the wall. It is time that I have an adult sized bed. It's time for me to be able to stretch as my heart contents. Its time for me to have a cool side of the pillow again...ahhh, the cool side of a pillow...how I have missed that sweet smelling, face comforting, gentle play in my hair from the chill thin air that washes over me and blows away any smoggy nightmares that may be looming.

Keep you fingers crossed for me that I can get a new bed soon. Because if I can't, I have a feeling that I will have some more broken dreams...and elbows.

Odd women out...

2011-08-03T13:11:00.000-07:00

Last night I had an Epiphany.

My nephew Palmer always comments on my CTR ring saying things like "Mommy and Daddy are married" or "Is this your married ring?". I always give him a little explanation that I'm not married and that my ring is a church ring. Once I even tried to explain how my ring was not on the same hand as his Mommy and Daddy's ring was, but that didn't get too far because he was obviously more interested in my cane.

After dinner Palmer said "This is Auntie Rie's cane, this is how she walks", he then limped and gimped and hopped around the living room. He is adorable. I however feel not so adorable when I am limping around with my cane. I miss high heels. I miss being able to use stairs easily. I miss not having stares from strangers follow me when I walk around a store. I miss being able to play and jump and walk everywhere I wanted to go. I get down a lot because I think that no one will want to date a girl like me, especially with a cane, and I put myself down thinking that I'm alone for a reason.

We caravan to the Dinosaur Museum in Thanksgiving Point, it is awesome there, but I was exhausted by the time we left. My leg felt as though it was giving out and I was angry with the fact that I was tired at 8:30 pm. Some of my favorite people in the world, went home together. I couldn't help but notice that I drove home alone. I am single. Singular. I wasn't down about it - it was actually a beautiful drive with great music, I just realized I was alone but not lonely.

I finally understood what it means to be single. I am alone until I am married or coupled. Duh, why did I not understand that before?

It doesn't mean that I am not worth the love and attentions of someone else. It doesn't mean that I don't deserve an eternal marriage. It doesn't mean that I am doing something wrong. All relationships fail before you find the one you belong with. That doesn't mean that I'm a failure. It just means that I haven't found my single man to couple with.

Until I do, I'm happy to wear my church ring. I'm happy to have other emblems of a single life like less responsibility, enjoying parties that run deep into the night, random vacations, and having a girls night almost every night with my roomies. I'm happy to be singular which has synonyms such as remarkable, extraordinary, outstanding, distinct, and odd.

I know that I will have days that I get down about being single, I'm sure that the post-spinal surgery days will be a hard trial for me; but I'm grateful to realize that things work on Heavenly Father's time (I am so grateful that I didn't marry the man I wanted 10 years ago, 10 months ago, or even 10 days ago), that I'm never alone, that I am sealed to my family, and I am promised a family of my own one day.

Last night I made new goals in my life. I am going to work on me; feeling happier, stronger, healthier, more spiritual, and using my singlehood to the fullest. I'm going to drink it all in.

God’s Country

2011-07-22T13:03:00.000-07:00

I was lucky to be able to spend Memorial Day and the Forth of July in what I call ‘God’s Country’ or aka Idaho. I love Idaho. It is becoming a fast rising favorite of vacation locations.

Memorial Day Annie and I went up to Idaho for the three day weekend. It was lovely to be able to spend the time with her entire immediate family. They are all so awesome. I laughed a ton and I really enjoyed getting away for a distressing vacation. Annie and I went to her Grandma’s gravesite on the way home; it was such a tender moment in our friendship. It was lovely to be able to take some time away and enjoy the fresh air. It rained a lot this weekend and it made the skies beautiful shades of white to purple-grey against the emerald green mountains. That skyline, upon leaving Idaho, is one of my favorite views in the world.

Fourth of July we went back up to Idaho, this time I caravanned behind Annie and Renny Cyr. This weekend was a much quieter one for me than Memorial. Annie, Renny and I went down town and looked through the tiny personal shops and took some pictures by the Idaho Falls temple. Later everyone went up to a fair in Driggs, ID, where as I spent my time in the Rexburg temple and then in Rexburg just enjoying the scenery. I took some pictures, took time by myself to think, and went on a really lovely drive. I got home pretty late and then everyone else returned shortly. I slept a ton this weekend and realized how tired I was from all of the doctor’s visits, work stresses, and emotional drama that has been happening. It was so nice to just relax. The Forth of July is my favorite holiday. I didn’t see any fireworks this year because I ended up driving home on the 4th and crashed when I got home.

Some of my favorite things about Idaho:
Its Green mountains seem to surround and roll across the landscape. The perfectly manicured fields of grains, vegetation, and flowers pattern the rich earth. The skies seem to be full of continuous fluffy clouds that slide beautifully through the sun’s rays. The air is cleaner, the people nicer, and the birds seem to chirp in a more sing-song way than in Utah.
The Munk Clan. The members in Annie’s family are more adorable and lovelier than the next. I always feel welcome, appreciated, and valued. I know I can be myself and that is all they expect. They are some of the most generous, Christ-like, and talented people I’ve ever met. They are a great example of a strong family that love and support each other through the good times, trials, and hardships. I love them all.
The Munk’s home; every room is clean, full of family photo’s, and gospel infused art/teachings. I feel calm there. I feel the peaceful spirit. I feel comfortable.
I love the Rexburg temple, the celestial room is the most beautiful that I have seen yet. I had such an amazing experience while I was in those sacred walls and it made me want to become a temple worker. It was a beautiful moment.
The bike. (As shown above.)
The Idaho Falls temple, I plan on going to it on my next Idaho trip.
Tiny shops and cafes that are sprinkled all over town.
The Sandwich Tree deli and the Reeds Dairy that has some of the best ice cream I’ve ever had. Hello snicker-doodle!!
How far away it is from everything lively, loud, and quickly entertaining.

Some of the things I could do without:
The never-ending popping noises that the huge bugs make as they smack into my car like gooey exploding bullets; leaving corpse-y marks that no squidgy, paper towel or high-powered car wash can remove.
The bugs in general.
When the air sometimes smells like cows…or cow pies.
The fact that it takes hours to get there…or else I would be there every weekend.
No good Mexican food anywhere.
My family isn’t a 10 minute drive away.
How far away it is from everything lively, loud, and quickly entertaining.

Dear 45th University Student Ward,

2011-07-22T13:00:00.000-07:00

I’m writing this with a very grateful heart although I feel as though I am losing some of the greatest blessings I have ever had; a relief society that was as strong as a true sisterhood, a ward that felt as though we were all family, and a bishop that was truly the father of our ward.
The past few years I have had some of my hardest trials that I am now able to look back on with a more positive attitude and with an entirely new perspective.
God really is aware of who we are and what we need. Our experiences, blessings, and trials really all depend on his timing and all-knowing wisdom. There are no words for me to convey how thankful I am for the love and support as I changed my life around. The 45th University Student Ward was a key role in helping me get a grip on my life, supporting me as I tried to heal a broken heart, and in learning how to love myself again. I wanted to share the experience that this last year has given me.
Before I came to this ward I was inactive. My old singles ward was full of clicks and judgments. I never felt as though I was cared about and I sat alone every week. I remember one day I embarrassingly asked my visiting teachers to hang out with me because of how lonely I felt. They stepped up to the plate, not because it was just a calling, but because they are genuinely great ladies. They befriended me and allowed me to feel as though I had friends in the ward. Besides these two remarkable girls, I was defined as the unpopular girl by the other members and there were a lot of rumors that floated around about me that were not true.
I went to the bishop because I needed guidance and I had some sins that I needed the atonement and the priesthood in order to heal from. I shared everything about myself with him. He shared that confidential and personal information with his wife and she shared it with the relief society during a class in church. She also shared my weaknesses in front of a huge group of people during a service activity. Now there were not only rumors spreading about me, but cruel gossip of the most personal nature. I was embarrassed, I was angry, and I really hated myself and my ward. I allowed myself to become inactive.
My room mates at that time moved away to college and I moved into my sister’s unfinished basement. One month later my mom passed away. My closest friends were all out of state. Both of my sisters are married with children and they turned to their families during this hard time. They both tried to be there for me as much as possible, but I still felt alone. My father proposed to my mom’s best friend the night of her viewing and the next morning they stood together in the family line as they received the guests to my mom’s funeral.
Two months later my Dad and his wife Betty were married in the SLC temple. I was extremely confused and hurt. I didn’t have a strong testimony of family and I couldn’t understand the eternal perspective of marriage. I then found out that my Dad and Betty would be trying for a baby. I felt as though I was replaced. There were a lot of harsh words that were not true that were said to me by my friends, some ward members, and people I worked with. I took it to heart for a long time and I refused to be comforted.
I then went looking for some sort of comfort that I could have with out depending on anyone else. I started some very selfish habits that forced my last piece of comfort and support to fade from my life. All of my time, money and efforts were spent on me, trying to keep me happy, trying to keep me occupied. The Holy Ghost had to leave because of the selfish choices I was making. I have never felt more alone then I did at this time. I started living on survivor mode. I went to work, I came home, hid in my room, and I waited to fall asleep. This lasted for about 3 years.
I had some friends try to support me during this time but I would never let anyone in. I wouldn’t allow myself trust anyone and I was unwilling to allow any type of vulnerability, I even started to avoid my loving, kind sisters. Until I found myself on my knees praying for support I realized how much I needed the gospel in my life. I asked for guidance, to feel apart of a family again, and for a friend.
I started going to sacrament again because I knew the church was true and I couldn’t deny the promptings that I was getting. I wanted so badly to partake of the sacrament and to feel the Holy Ghost in my life. I started to feel not only the bitterness of sin, but the godly sorrow that the atonement requires.
Circumstances made it time to move out of my sister’s house and I was told that a girl named Annie Munk was looking for a room mate. I moved in a few months later.
Heavenly Father knew that it would take a very special person in my life to help me wake up from the habits and cycles of self-loathing that I was in. I really cannot think of any lady that is kinder, wiser, or more relatable for me than Annie. Over a month and a half of my moving in Annie knew my past, my present, and my hopelessness in the future. I felt stuck and alone and she gave me a direction and sincere friendship. She told me about the 45th ward and how it has many different types of people in it. That no one was perfect and that there were a lot of people working on coming back. She also told me that you were trustworthy and kind. She prepared me and supported me in coming back to church. I decided to send my records to our ward and I set up an appointment with my bishop.
I cannot describe how scared I was about opening up about my life and my status in repentance. Satan was giving every personal attack that he could come up with and there were many times that I know I wouldn’t have succeeded with out the help of an amazing and strong Relief Society president, room mate, and friend like Annie and some of the most influential friends I have ever met.
When I was meeting with Bishop Menlove, telling him about the things that I needed to work on and the things that I wanted in my life, he was so gentle. He helped me see the love that the Savior had for me. He helped me learn how to apply the gospel to my life. He helped me forgive myself; to bring the Holy Ghost back in my life and show me that there is hope in the future. He led me to a life worth living. He helped me learn how to love again, how to trust people around me and to let them in, and to see hope in a healthy and loving future that only Heavenly Father can give to us.
When I received my temple recommend I was able to go to the temple with some of the people that mean the most to me in life. It really helped me understand how families are eternal. I felt as though I was right at home in those sacred walls. I felt the love and true joy that the gospel can bring to you and those you love that night. I was reminded that I will never have to be alone. I would have never felt that perfect promise without your guidance.
The 45th University Ward will always be such a treasure in my heart. I have never felt so accepted and supported in a ward than I have in this one. The people that made up this ward family are so unique and wonderful that I honestly couldn’t have found such ease in returning to the right path as I did here.
I had no idea that by having me fall into the hardest trials I could be catapulted into the best kind of life. A life that is full of passion, security, and truth. Thank you for helping me to see things clearly. Thank you for helping me feel the spirit and for aiding me in getting back to the temple. Thank you for leading me to some of the most beautiful moments in my life.
The bishopric in the 45th is unlike any I’ve ever known. I have never so completely loved a ward as I did ours and I know it’s because of the people that presided over it.
I will be eternally grateful for having you in my life and I the best way that I could show how thankful I am for you is by living the best life I possibly can and by choosing to tie myself in every way to our Heavenly Father and his marvelous plan of happiness.
I received my endowment on June 25 at the 10:20 AM session in the Jordan River Temple. (Those in attendance: My Dad and Betty Nichols, London Riding, Lera and Greg Hess, Shannon and McWayne Mumford, Larisa Newman, Annie Munk, Stephanie Shott, Maiki Naone, Allison Hajek, Brooke Ipson, Allyson Browning, Jimbob and Abbe Hoggan, H. Ben Hansen, Brian Wilcox, and Emily Gibbs.)
It was the first time in my adult life that I felt beautiful. I was happy to the truest form. I felt close to my family, my friends, and the eternities. It is the best place on Earth; it radiates purity, promise, and potential. My oldest sister London was my escort and I loved being able to share that with her. Lera and London bought me all of my temple clothes for an early birthday gift and it was so great going and picking out my dress with Lera. These are now some my favorite memories that I have with them. They are both the world’s best sisters. I love them dearly.
Thank you so much for helping me get here. I finally feel as though I’m on the right track to my future. I am so blessed.
With all my love, Sister Sariah Nichols

Ps. I miss you 45th.

The Utah Arts Festival Presents:

2011-07-18T14:34:00.000-07:00

(My favorite pics of Annie and Me are from the concerts we go to.)

Ray Lamontagne & the Pariah Dogs, The Secret Sisters, and Brandi Carlile.

I went to Library Square on June 18th with Annie and our buddy Matt Marques. It was a really great concert and I was really impressed with all of the singers and the emotions that went through the crowd.

I am an armature listener to these artists but I equally loved them all. The woodsy-folk-rock of Ray, the bluegrass harmonies of the Secret Sisters, and the Soulful rich weavings of the heartfelt lyricist Brandi Carlile were all so lovely.

My favorite part of the concert was when Brandi Carlile sang Forever Young. It was so beautiful. I really am loving Brandi's songs and I hope that if you haven't heard her sing, that you can invest some time in looking her up. She is amazing.

There Was No You, Brandi Carlile:

When I see myself, I'm seeing you too
As long as I remember it
I'm feeling like I knew that
My jokes aren't funny
The truth isn't true
If there was no you

If you were my boat in the deep blue sea
I'd probably sink you down
I know I should have thanked you for carrying me
But for you I would happily drown

All along your way
The darkest night, the longest day
I know what to say to make you laugh
And nothing you could do could make me turn my back on you
When you're looking for a fight I'm your man
When you need a friend you got my hand

What I really mean, what I'm trying hard to say is that
I'm counting on you and you got me too
My secrets aren't safe, I'm singing out of tune if there was no you
If there was no you

All along your way, the darkest night the longest day
I know what to say to make you laugh
And nothing you could do could make me turn my back on you
When you're lookng for a fight I'm your man
When you need a friend you got my hand
When you need a friend you got my hand
You got my hand

When I see myself, I'm seeing you too
As long as I remember it
I'm feeling like I knew that
My jokes aren't funny
The truth isn't true
If there was no you

If you were my boat in the deep blue sea
I'd probably sink you down
I know I should have thanked you for carrying me
But for you I would happily drown

All along your way
The darkest night, the longest day
I know what to say to make you laugh
And nothing you could do could make me turn my back on you
When you're looking for a fight I'm your man
When you need a friend you got my hand

What I really mean, what I'm trying hard to say is that
I'm counting on you and you got me too
My secrets aren't safe, I'm singing out of tune if there was no you
If there was no you

All along your way, the darkest night the longest day
I know what to say to make you laugh
And nothing you could do could make me turn my back on you
When you're lookng for a fight I'm your man
When you need a friend you got my hand
When you need a friend you got my hand
You got my hand

Ugh!! My aching lumber spine!

2011-07-13T13:12:00.000-07:00

(This is not a scan of my MRI, but it is a great image of a herniated disc so I thought I'd post it. Thank you google image.)

In the close of November 2010 my lower back started to hurt immensely. There was no trauma that brought on the pain so I didn’t think much about it until it started affecting my right leg. One Sunday I was headed to church with a lot of pain in my right hip. I left my house limping and took a step off the porch, my leg crumbled beneath me. I thought that I must have missed the step because that has never happened to me before. I took the second step down and I was left again on the ground from a leg that had no strength to support me. I still tried to go to church. I hobbled into the chapel and sat down on the closest chair to the door. My hip was hurting so bad that I knew I had to go to the insta-care.

I had a few x-rays taken of my hip and a few reflex tests done. I had no strength in my right leg when I bended it and zero extension strength. The doctor said that I had tendentious in my hip and sent me home with a bottle of ibuprofen. I made a doctor’s appointment with my PCP the next day. He said that he wanted to watch it for a while to see what was wrong, thinking that it was most likely a back injury, knowing it had nothing to do with tendentious. I went home and basically stayed off my leg as much as possible. I could barely move it and I fell a lot around the house. I felt very embarrassed and ashamed to ask my roommates for help in simple tasks like cooking dinner, laundry, and lifting things that I needed help with cleaning.

I had no answers and it seemed as though everywhere I went people needed to know every detail of my trauma and what I was doing about it. That was a very stressful part of going through this for me. I had no answers to give and everyone had an opinion about what I should be doing or what my diagnosis was.

About a month and a half later, I was back to normal. I had a steroid shot from my PCP and a couple of days after that I felt fine. My leg was getting a lot stronger and I was almost back to full recovery. I thanked the miracle shot in my prayers for healing me. I was able to go on a trip to San Diego that I had been planning for a few months and I got around just fine.

The beginning of February it hit again except this time I had no pain in my hip or back. All I had was numbness and weakness in my right leg. If I bend my knee at all I have no control over the muscles in my leg and I fall. Any change in the ground that may bend my leg slightly is a booby trap, every stair must be taken one at a time with my left leg going up, or my right leg going down, every turn I make I normally pivot very slowly or I hold onto a wall, and I started to realized that I needed assistance in walking in order for me to work or do the normal tasks I was used to being independent with. My Dad and his wife Betty bought me a cane and it’s been my constant frienemy since. I hate it and yet I am desperate for it’s support.

During the beginning of the second go-a-round with the weakness, I chose to move to a new apartment complex with my roommates. We didn’t feel as though our current abode was safe for us anymore. I was thoroughly mortified with every box that I had to ask for help to pack, tape, and move into another room. I felt pathetic and useless that I couldn’t help the great friends that helped us move into our new place. I was heart broken that I wasn’t getting better and I was missing out on so many things I used to help with or feel apart of. Through all of this I have had angel friends that have been so patient with me and stood beside me when I had to lean on them.

Annie has been almost saintly in her kindness towards me, not just in the trials in my life, but also the blessings. Every day without falter she helps me, waits for me, and escorts me in whatever is in need or want. Not just in the physical way, but the emotional, the mental, and most important, the spiritual. She has sat by me in waiting rooms, walked me through paperwork, kept the influences that brought my spirits down out of my life, and made sure that I knew I was a strong and important even when I felt as though I had solid proof that I wasn’t. When friends I loved bailed on me emotionally, Annie was true. When loved ones were not close to help me, Annie was there to lean on. When I was too emotional to get a grip, Annie listened to me and helped me feel calm again. When there was no light at the end of the tunnel, she shined like the sun leading me in progression. She always made sure I was moving forward. She saw that I had the right knowledge and doctors to aid me. She forgives me when I am impatient, distempered or angry and she helps me change for the better. She has been the strongest tangible yolk through all of my fears. I just can't thank her enough or give credit to where I would fell as though we were even. I love her, very much, and I couldn't have gotten through this as I have with out her.

The info:
I had a MRI which gave me the answers that I needed to go forward in treatment. I have 5 herniated discs, 2 budging discs, sciatica and Degenerative Disc Disease. I have the most damage to nerves in my lumber spine that affect my right leg extension. I have basically lost all strength in that area. If I am sitting I cannot raise my right leg whether it is bent or straight. I also can’t push it forward whether I am sitting or standing. My dorsal movement is fine which allows me to move my ankle and foot as if nothing was wrong and have all of that strength that is needed to push off it when walking, lock it when taking stairs, and the mobility of driving. If I bend my leg while standing I loose all strength. My leg feels numb and asleep from my right hip, curving into my inner thigh, my knee and inner calf.

Right now I am meeting with a Neurosurgeon at the U of U Neuroscience department. He has a two foot wiry grey pony-tail and eyebrows that are wildly out of control. He wears v-neck scrubs that show a chaotic chest hair collection and he doesn’t wear socks…and for some reason I love him. He is kind, goofy, and quirky and I feel comfortable with him, which is a lovely change from my other doctors. I will be having a EMG soon and I’m nervous about the pain, but I’m hopeful for it to lead me to a better relief in the long run.

The worst part of all of the medical procedures for me was the MRI; I’m claustrophobic and very jumpy when it comes to loud noises. I was terrified, but I got through it and I hope I won’t have to do it again. The best part was going to an office I trusted Summit Pain Management, where Annie works, and meet the people that she works with and that is where I had a spinal evaluation. The most embarrassing part has been the fact that I had to pee in a cup for a guy I call “Annie’s hottest friend” because he was the UN at Summit. The most hated is the cane that I carry. The most frustrating is the insurance and paperwork circus rings that I have to jump through. The most tiring was the 2 ½ months of physical therapy, 3-4 times a week, which I had to condition through for insurance purposes with no physical result from the hard work. The most painful part was the spinal injection. The most humiliating is the slow pace of walking, taking stairs, getting up and down, dressing, and cleaning. The most hurtful are the curious or mocking eyes that follow me in public. The most self-defeating are the times when I don’t lock my knee properly and I fall…over..and over again. The most tearful are the moments I realize that someone I love, and wanted to be there for me, doesn’t care about me. The most surprising is the fact that I keep trying to make my life better. The most reassuring is the support that I have from a wonderful family. The most encouraging is the constant love from a handful of loyal and wonderful friends. The most relief comes from the sincere prayer after a long and tearful day. The most empowered moments come from all of the gentle reminders, visits, texts, gifts, face book comments, movie nights, letters, love, hugs, girl’s nights, dinner dates, and unwavering support that I get from dear ones that help me realize that I’m not alone in this.

I’m sorry if this was long-winded, but it’s been a very long road for me to endure. It’s not over yet and I pray that the support from family, friends, work, and doctors is with me until the end.

LBD – Low Blogging Desire

2011-07-13T13:06:00.000-07:00

As the bored, crazy souls have noticed,(and God bless you bored, crazy souls)my blogging has been basically extinct.

My blog…sometimes I think this is a pointless hobby. I have put it off for months on end. Not because there has been a lack of things to post and keep an updated status of my life endeavors but because there has been so much going on I have no idea where to start. I also feel as though a lot of my experiences are pending closure. Most of the things I want to leave an update on feel as though they could only end with a ‘…’.

For reasons of pure exhaustion I just need to say it; Crap has hit the fan in my financial, medical, and social life. There have been a lot of trials going on in my life and I think that writing about them will be placing a major ‘downer’ on my blog. Luckily there is opposition in everything. Along with the trials I have been receiving so many blessings that I don’t even know how to handle them.

I’ve realized some things that felt very important in the last few months: When you feel like you are falling apart, you also will have things that fall into place. The blessings and trials in your life are something to take note of. Lastly, sometimes you have to wait until something passes so you can have a clear perspective.

I will try to start blogging again. I have a feeling that it will be sporadic, chaotic, and maybe at times, long winded. I apologize for that up forward.

It’s time for me to feel rooted again. Raw. Natural. Me. Things I have forgotten for a little while or placed as a low priority. Thanks for reading.

Super Bowl Party

2011-02-10T09:49:00.000-08:00

(a pic of Me, Stephanie, and Allison. I know I'm barely in this shot but it was my favorite one. :])

This year we threw a super bowl party at our place. I think that there is no need to say how little I care about sports. But I do care about parties and friends so if there is a need...there will be a party.

I was routing for the Packers...basically because I had some friends that cared for them growing up. I always say that I love sports - my friends correct me stating that I actually love the athletes. It's true.

The only part that I actually watched was the half-time show...and it was so horrible. I don't know what was going on with those B.E.P's but it wasn't good.

There was a bunch of pot luck goodies that our friends brought by. I found myself mingling from group to group of friends through out the party. Always being entertained and in good company. There also may or may not have been the best foot massage I've ever had as well. (Thanks to my little tiger friend Brian)

I love my home. I love the feeling it has when people are over. It's warm and inviting and there is always room for another friend there. I really appreciate that people aren't "clicky" when they are at my place. Friendships bloom. Conversations flow. People just feel comfortable and at ease.

There isn't a week that goes by that I don't hear some sort of compliment about our house or the people that live there. It's such a good feeling that my little sanctuary can be shared by so many people that I love.

Stay classy San Diego...

2011-02-09T11:37:00.000-08:00

Yes, I know, my blog sucks lately. I'm sorry. I have been stuck with an Internet at home that I have to sit in my living room hooked to a cord while I use it - thus no blogging. I need to get a wireless modem so I can actually blog or write in my room with some peace and quiet.

I thought I'd give a quick update on a little trip I just had. I went to San Diego with Annie on January 27th and we flew home on January 28th. Why such a short trip you ask? Well that is simple. We flew out there to see our favorite man, Neal Mortensen, graduate the Marines and then bring him home as fast as possible so we could savor his 17 day leave.

The flight to Arizona had us cracking up with laughter. I’m sure it had a lot to do with the sleep deprivation but I cannot help but give credit to the people that we were lucky enough to sit by. *raises a half filled airplane cup of warm apple juice* So here is to you - Body Oder Man and Pocket-Pal Predator Weave. Our flights wouldn’t have been the same without you.

The flight going to California- well we may have been the annoying people on that one. We laughed the entire time and listened to Annie’s iPod. Annie and I arrived on Thursday morning into San Diego, we checked into our hotel, and then went straight to the Marine Base. We were in love with all of the military men and their polite manners. (I kind of want to move there –there were fine men falling out of the woodwork.)

I got to meet the mission leaders that were over the Marine base. They were the loveliest couples. They were so happy to serve and had some amazing stories about the men that changed their lives during basic training. Neal came and met us by the Marina and we had lunch that was provided by the church as we hugged and caught up on the last 3 months. We walked around base for a few hours and got more food and did a bit of shopping.

That night Annie and I went to old town San Diego and had some delicious Mexican food at Cafe Coyote. Everything was delicious. We walked around for a bit and went window shopping in some really interesting stores...were Annie got in trouble by an overly angry sales clerk as she tried on a wrestling mask.

The next morning was the graduation and we went back to the base. I cannot even express my love and pride for Neal. He is such an amazing friend. He has helped me become closer to the church, helped me trust others more, and helped me love myself. He is dependable and charming and strong. He brings laughter to my life every day. He has helped me in so many ways. I could never thank him enough for the change that he brought to my life. Watching him graduate as a Marine was such an honor. I am so proud of him.

Relief Society Retreat

2010-11-16T07:18:00.000-08:00

The night before the boating trip at Echo Lake, with my singles ward, our Relief Society had a special retreat in Bishop Menlove's cabin. It was so much fun.

The girls had such a good time as we laughed around the dinning room table and talked about the craziest dating experiences. Later we were all touched by each other's tender testimonies of the gospel.

We also had the privilege of listening to a choir named Divine Heritage. We were all spiritually feed by their uplifting devotional on the rich blessings the savior brings into our lives. Even though it was freezing sitting outside on the wrap-around deck, everyone was feeling the warmth from the spirit that was there.

I got to know some of the girls in my ward that I haven't gotten to know before the trip. The feeling of sisterhood that developed in our retreat was so strong and we all felt a part of something special. I'm so grateful for the Relief Society and for our ward's presidency. They are amazing women who are great examples of what a lady should be.

'Rieting time' lyrics

2010-11-12T13:15:00.000-08:00

I wrote a song, a love song actually. I showed my roommate Annie my lyrics and she immediately started to write music for it. She made it into a beautiful song, I hope one day I can learn the music and be able to feel comfortable enough to sing it for you.

Until then, here are the words and if you ever are so lucky to hear Annie sing-I'm sure she'd play it for you. :)

Star's Song

I wish I may, I wish I might
be the light in your dark eyes
I twinkle, only for you
glowing in the wide navy blue

I'm a falling star
falling, falling, falling for you

Milky white skin, so pale and delicate
waiting to be seen
through the soft clouds
and whistling maple leaves
I'm shining down for you to see

Watching you sleeping
on these carbon colored sheets
your heavy eyes closed tight
in perfect trust and perfect peace
I will shine bright through the night

I'm a falling star
falling, falling, falling for you

My skin, the color of sugar
tastes just as sweet
breathe in the night air
through your lips,savor me

I'm your falling star
falling, falling, falling

Random beloved poem

2010-11-12T09:44:00.000-08:00

This poem means a lot to me. I first heard it when I was going through a really hard depression spell when I was in Jr. High. One of my friend's parents told me that he thought of me when he heard this poem. Star, became one of my nicknames because of it.

Bright star, would I were steadfast as thou art--
Not in lone splendour hung aloft the night
And watching, with eternal lids apart,
Like nature's patient, sleepless Eremite,
The moving waters at their priest like task
Of pure ablution round earth's human shores,
Or gazing on the new soft-fallen mask
Of snow upon the mountains and the moors--
No--yet still steadfast, still unchangeable,
Pillow'd upon my fair love's ripening breast,
To feel for ever its soft fall and swell,
Awake for ever in a sweet unrest,
Still, still to hear her tender-taken breath,
And so live ever--or else swoon to death.

Utah Utes

2010-11-12T09:34:00.000-08:00

I went to my very first college football game a few weeks ago. It was super fun even though it rained almost the entire time. We were all soaked to the bone except our friend Isaac "hot sauce" Talbot who packs a travel slicker whenever he goes to an outdoor sporting event. Isaac is a hard core sports fan. I on the other hand have no idea what is going on with any sport. Isaac was kind enough to buy My, Annie's, and Neal's ticket to go see the game.
The Utes crushed Colorado State 59-6.
(A special thanks to Annie for keeping me updated on what was actually happening!!)

Ninja Strike!!

2010-11-10T14:32:00.000-08:00

(I’d like to thank my roommates for unknowingly providing my blog with demonstration photos for my rendition of How to play Ninja Strike. Honorary room mate Neal Mortensen and roomies Logan Smith and Annie Munk)

This is a game that is played at my home often. I've never heard about it before I moved into the Chateau de la hotties, but ever since I find that more and more people know how to play the game.

The objection:
To Ninja Strike the other players until you are the last Ninja standing. (You do this by slapping one of their hands or feet.)

The rules:
-start by standing in front of your opponent with your hands centered or in a circle with the crowd you are playing with.

-Someone yells out the war cry of "NINJA STRIKE"
-Every one takes a defensive stance. You will learn quickly what type of stances will work to your advantage or will get you out of the game faster than a ninja assassin.

-The person who attacks get to make one move to try to tag the player next to him/her. Once you strike, you must stay how you land. You cannot move back to where you started from.
-The defending ninja can move once to dodge the strike.

-If the defensive ninja did not get slapped on the hands or feet they will then become the Striking Ninja.
-They have one strike toward their enemy and then they must freeze as the other ninja then dodges them and will then become the assassin.
-Continue playing until only one Ninja is left.

As you practice your ninja strikes will get faster, more lethal, and you will learn how to trick your enemies into moving into danger.

Please ask me for a demo if you ever need an object lesson. Good luck to those future ninjas out there.

(for more ninja strike photos please visit my face book photo album named "Ninja Strike".)

26 on 7-31

2010-11-10T13:14:00.000-08:00

I turned 26 on July 31st and I celebrated with my family, my "extended family" the Dunn's, and some of my close friends. (Shannon Newman (and her hubby McWayne), Rachel (and her family RA, Eden, Zion, and Gideon), and Amber Woolsey.)

We all had dinner together and they sang to me while I opened my lovely and thoughtful gifts. I feel very blessed to have such great friends and the world's best sisters.

My sister London made this AMAZING cake. She is so talented with just about anything she tries. Naturally cake decorating is easily part of her many talents. The only thing about this cake that was better than her master decorating skill, was the taste. I have never had such a yummy cake in my whole life. This was such a great gift!!

Luckily this mass of sugar and chocolate was made to feed about 50+ people so I was able to take it home and leave it on my kitchen counter for a few days as my room mates and I flew around this like vultures and ate a piece every breakfast, lunch, and dinner until the only part left was the cardboard.

Turning 26 was weird for me. I'm not feeling old yet like others said I would, but it did bring on a small feeling of disappointment. I want to be a mom, a wife, a writer, more active in the church, and all of the other great miles stones of life and I feel like I'm no where near any of my long-term goals. Luckily for me, I have time on my side to complete my many wants in life.

When I blew out the candle I wished for something I never wished for before. It was simple and something that I wonder if anyone else would have wished for that specific thing. I can't tell you what it is because I want it to come true. I feel like it's starting to... :)

Echo Lake

2010-11-10T09:36:00.000-08:00

(Logan Smith, me, and Allison Wood)

I want to live by Echo Lake, case closed.

When I was younger I used to dream about living in Garden City, but I think that is because I've never been to this amazing vacation spot. After boating here, my heart will never turn back.

My singles ward had a service challenge where everyone in the ward would donate service hours. After we all collected enough we turned them into the bishop and as a reward he took us up to Echo Lake and drove us around on his boat. One of my most favorite things in life is to go boating. I love all that it has to offer. The wind in my hair, the beautiful water below, and the sky above you and all you see is horizon. It's you and the beautiful earth showing you how surrounded you are by it's goodness.

On the boat we all danced and sang to R&B music and we laughed as our church friends tried to do tricks on the water skis. There were a few that were trying extreme-sport-style tricks on the water tube, most were unsuccessful.

We ate lunch under the shady trees. We took turns on the boat and turns under the sun on the docks with the water slapping up on our legs. We all got to know each other better as a ward family.

Yep, the rewards of service can be pretty awesome.

Bear Lake

2010-11-10T09:32:00.001-08:00

(This is a photo to show the vast difference between my summer skin and Annie’s. Yikes!!)

Oh how I love Bear Lake. Some of my favorite childhood memories were spent next to this insanely blue body of water.

One of my childhood best friends owned a cabin in Garden City, and still to this day even though I haven’t seen him almost a decade, his cabin is one of my favorite places on the earth. I also went to Bear Lake for Shannon’s family reunion every year. Her family became a part of my family and I feel in love with all of them and our temporary home by the lake.

This August my friend Mike invited me up to camp on his property. My room mate Annie and him are really good friends, and I’m grateful that they are because I would have never met such an amazing guy as Mike, with out her. The were four of us ladies that shared the camper while the guys slept outside in tents.

The waves on the lake were super choppy because the weather was almost bad, partly cloudy. (Which is what I call Annie-Rie weather because she loves the sun and I love the shade) Riding the ski-do was scary because we would bounce a few feet in the air with every bad wave and there were a few times that my body completely left the ski-do as well as Annie. When we were done with our terrifying yet elating ride we were slowly pulling our ski-do in past the first set of boonies and we cut the engine. Our ski-do started to tip and I leap-frog jumped off of it thinking that would save Annie from falling in. Wrong! My legs sent the already diagonal Ski-do flying to the side and both of us were catapulted into the freezing lake. It was a sight to see.

We read books on the seashell covered beach and took a ton of pictures of our friends and some un-expecting hotties next to us that were playing football. We ate raspberry ice cream shakes and laughed about the previous late night secret swimming adventures.

(Becky Foster, me, and Annie Munk)

ode to the sexy voice of John Mayer

2010-11-09T13:04:00.000-08:00

In August I was lucky to go to the John Mayer concert with two of my favorite people. (Neal Mortensen and Annie Munk) It was one of the best concerts I've ever been to. John Mayer was sultry in the way he wooed the crowd with his velvety soft voice.

Everywhere you looked there were ladies screaming and fanning themselves, men clapping in awe, and homemade signs being waved like surrendering flags to the majesty of what is John Mayer's poetically enchanting lyrics.

If I could die and come back as in inanimate object, I would be the first in line to be John Mayer's guitar. The way he plays that instrument looks almost as though some heartbreaking unrequited love story is being told, as his fingers dance along the strings. The poor guitar has no way express it's wanting to be with John, so she sings out loud wishing he understands her.

This concert was truly magical. I was happy that most of the songs he sang I was able to sing along with and the one's I've never heard before became fast favorites.

My two favorite songs are:

GRAVITY
This is the sexiest song ever written. I cannot even stand how hot the music vs. the lyrics are in this song. The guitar has face melting solos as it's trying to seduce the masculine voice that is weaving in and out of it's delicious cords. *sings* "Ohh-oooo Gravity" Please listen to this song!!

DREAMING WITH A BROKEN HEART
Interestingly enough, this song reminds me of my Mom. I know that the lyrics are supposed to be about a broken up couple, but I can't help but think of the hard times I have had after my mom's passing and The waking up is the hardest part" and all you can do is "You roll outta bed and down on your knees". I heard this song for the first time when I was standing in a Quizno's restaurant and I was bawling. The girl behind the counter looked as though she had no idea what to do, so I left, and I found out the title of the song and made a CD so I could listen to it until it became a part of me.

NaBloPoMo, take 2

2010-11-09T07:07:00.000-08:00

Last year I took on the challenge to blog one post for each day of the month of November. NaBloPoMo(National Blog Posting Month)was extremely fun for me to complete in 2009. I loved it. This year I'm taking on the goal of blogging throughout November with a bit of hesitancy.

This summer has probably been one of the busiest seasons of my life. Between traveling and work and meeting new and delicious single friends, I have just fallen out of the habit of blogging. Actually I'm going to be really honest here, I haven't even touched my book in the last 5 months, and I'm really embarrassed to admit that. I've found more distractions in life than I ever could have planned for.

There has been a lot that has happened and luckily for me that gives me many things to blog about; so this month I'm going to make a goal of writing for every day and while doing so I can hopefully catch everyone up on what I have been doing these past few months.

I've prepared by making a list of 30 topics and I even had a bit of overflow so I'm hoping that writing these posts will be easy and I wont get stopped by writer's block. Wish me luck.

Riepie.blogspot.com, I've missed you my dear friend. I'm glad that we are starting to hang out again. I'm hoping that time away from you hasn't ruined our friendship, or my writing...

1 post down - 29 to go.

I Write Like...

2010-07-22T01:27:00.000-07:00

I write like
Charles Dickens

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Go here. Copy and paste something you've written (I used my a few pages from my book that I'm working on.) I was surprised to see who my pages were calling to. I got this link from Confession of a Rookie's page. This was fun.

blog idea #1

2010-06-21T14:50:00.001-07:00

Last month I not only had a lot on my plate but I also was having a blog dry spell. The beautiful musings of postings past had drifted away from me and I was unable to find what I wanted to write about. I would sign in to Blogger and sit in front of my layout for about an hour or so without anything coming to mind. Being a true Nichols girl, I went to the pen and paper for help. Life always seems better when there is a list to be made. The subject of this list was "blog ideas - write away".

Today as I turned in my journal to that blog list I decided to start with #1. Two magical words sang back to me as I felt happy with my decision to start at the top.

#1. Friend Spotlights
(write down friends/family names and draw them at random to do a spotlight on them. Make each one personal and easy to read.)

I wrote down names of loved ones and put them into a blue coke-a-cola glass and drew the first spotlight.

drum roll...

Spotlight: Rachel Ream

2010-06-21T14:49:00.001-07:00

Full Name:
Rachel Erin 'Mckinnon' Ream

Things I love about you:
You are such a thoughtful and sincere person. You take friendship and family seriously. I can always depend on you to listen or to have someone to be there for me. I love that you always call me or write me a letter on important dates regarding my mother. You're always on time and you are super dependable. You are the best massage therapist in the world. I love your urban fashion and your many ways to pay less for amazingly cute things.

Something Rachel doesn't know:
I think of Rachel as one of the key roles in me gaining a testimony of the LDS church. Between the conversations while working at Shopko, going to church, and just being a wonderful friend, I was given many enlightened experiences. She helped me realize the love that Heavenly Father has for me. She also was extremely supportive of me taking my time to gain a testimony for myself.

Things to know about Rachel:
She has an amazing singing voice. It's sweet, clear, and beautiful. She is a great writer. She is my co-captain of the 'rieting time' group. She is a very patient and loving mother of 3. She is extremely smart and always witty.

Some of Rachel's nicknames:
Scout, Pookie, Rache...

A memory of Rachel that she might not remember:
In girl's camp we were hanging out in our group's tent. I was lying down on a sleeping bag and reading. Rachel was looking through a notebook where I had some drawings and random things that I had written down. On the first page there was a disco song that I was in love with. She sang the song in a jewel-like voice and in a very slow and indie rhythm. Later when we were home and I showed her the insanely heavy disco beat that came from the actual song - she hated it. I have never sung that song with it's real tune since. :)

Small note to Rachel:
I'm so grateful that you are my friend. I have so much respect for the way that you love and mother your children. I love how our friendship has grown so solid over the years. I am blessed to have you to depend on and to be able to talk to. Your kind and wise words have helped me so much. You are one amazing lady and I hope that in the future I can be as genuine and sweet hearted as you are. Thank you for always being patient with me and my craziness. I love you very much. XO. Rie.

Time may change me

2010-06-05T12:37:00.000-07:00

Hello friend.

My blog gives the impression that I’m slacking. My posts have decided to take a vacation without my knowing. Some people I work with had asked my why I haven’t been blogging. My reply to these unexpected readers…I was busy. To quote one of my Heroes Jane Austen, “Life seems but a quick succession of busy nothings.” When ever I feel overwhelmed by life’s demands I always can hear the strong clear voice of Fanny Price say this memorable line.

However, as of late, my life seems to be full of busy some things instead of nothings. I was born with the mind to go through life with a die-hardism objective. I find change extremely difficult. I look to the past and compare the present to it with a lack of hope.

Presently, I find myself comfortable with the outcomes of my recent stresses.

Between all of the packing and unpacking, moving and finding new roots, and the goodbyes to a much loved friend as she left her wedding reception coupled, I feel completely happy with my present changes.

One of my favorite movies is French Kiss. I think that the protagonist Kate and I are kindred spirits. She is loyal, stubborn, and knows exactly what she wants in life. Her fears corner her into life habits. She also finds herself sincerely surprised when there is anything that doesn't follow her plans.

At the end of the movie her struggles are all mollified by the new life she was in. She was happy, standing in a vineyard that smelled like grapes and lavender while being held by Kevin Kline. (Not too shabby!!)

I didn’t know 6 months ago that my best friend would marry a man that she wasn’t interested in dating. Luckily Shannon and McWayne fell into a perfect love with each other. I couldn’t imagine a better match for my friend. He is kind, generous, spiritual, and supportive.

I was surprised by how many people I had at disposal when I asked for help. My move was so quick. I had so many volunteers that I had to send people home. I have had to make schedules for people to help me pack and unpack. I’ve had so many loved ones supporting me.

I had no idea a few months ago that I would be moving into a smaller bedroom with a small dog and two roommates. I was trying to get my own place. I was furniture shopping. I was planning my color choices for each room. I was buying things that would only fit into my own dream place. But that didn’t happen. I’m living in my old apartment complex that I moved out of into a larger living arrangement. But I notice I’m smiling as I’m unpacking. I’m at perfect ease when I talking to my roommates. It feels natural as though I’ve been here for years. I feel as though my life has lead up to be here. To be sitting on the floor next to a bed frame that is only half way put up. Happy. I’m so happy.

I feel as though I’ve been repotted and immediately my life is blooming. My roots are already deep and sheltered.

Things I am not a fan of...

2010-04-28T09:36:00.001-07:00

Ed Hardy - Seriously? He is a crap designer. I can't stand the tattoo art that is on every teen t-shirt, purse, and shoe I see. Your art reminds me of a modern Lisa Frank. I don't get it.

Xanadu - I watched this for my first and last time with my friend Jen. This was the worst movie I've ever seen. Now I understand why everyone makes fun of it.

Twitter - Why does updating your status though out the day appeal to so many people? I don't want to read about how Jessica Simpson uses ear candles. These tweets are starting to show up in my magazines and I'm not happy about it.

Leggings - It doesn't matter if you are wearing leggings under a dress that barely covers your bum, it's still immodest. It's just like wearing pantie hose under a short dress, except your ankles are showing. Just saying.

Yelling - Please, calm down people. I'm pretty sure if I'm right in front of you, in the same room, on the phone, or in the car I can hear you.

Potty humor - It's not funny. It's gross.

Abusive dieting - Stop flaunting how big/fat/ugly/worthless you are. The only one you are convincing is yourself. Please stop being mean to my friend, which is you. You don't have to be rail thin to be amazing. You already are.

Hatred - Whether it's for a race, gender, age, belief, sexual orientation, or status. Please stop. I'm so tired of hearing the back handed comments that shows everyone exactly who you hate. Everyone is different. I'm always surprised that people are not used to this...

Leaving on a jet plane...

2010-04-07T07:27:00.000-07:00

Tonight, I'm taking the red eye to NY to see my friend Jenn. Loves it!!!

Today, 3 is not my favorite number

2010-03-31T14:39:00.000-07:00

Today marks the third year from my Mother's passing. Three is normally my favorite number; but not today. Today 3 rises as a dark suffocating wave trying to bury me. I can't handle the time that is passing. I miss my Mom. I miss having her craziness and generosity sprinkle through my life. Last night, I cried myself asleep. I didn't want today to come. But it did. And I'm here. Without her.

Last night I slept in her old shirt and I wore it again today to work because I didn't want to take it off. It's faded, it's old, and even though it's not possible I sometimes think it smells like her closet. A closet that I used to love opening and feeling the soft material of faded and well used clothes. The smell carried powdery lotion, soft wood, fresh soap, and somehow memories.

My Mom's clothes were always used and abused. She had moccasins that were missing beads on the top. Dresses that never fit her shoulders. Pants that always had thread strings hanging off a seam. Her shirts were overly soft from use. The colors changed through time into muted blends. There were patches ironed onto thinning fabrics. Safety pins holding buttons in place. Tags that no longer held script because of wear. Lace with extra eyelets that were uneven with the pattern.

My mom never really cared about having new and up to date clothing. She always sacrificed for things she loved more; her family, her fun, and food.

Growing up I was always entertained with the newest board game or movie. I have many memories of going shopping with my Mom and buying ridiculous things that would entertain us for the weekend. We went out to eat with relish; we dined out almost as much as we dined in. She would buy trinkets for the grand kids. She lent/gave money to those who needed it. She bought gifts for the entire neighborhood during the holidays. She gave us updated summer and winter wardrobes every year.

My mom was a giver. Whether it be Easter eggs to every widow and spinster in the neighborhood or advise to a child unwilling to listen.

She gave everything. No one was left wanting when they were in company of my Mother. Today as I wear a raggedy faded t-shirt, I remember her generosity. I remember her need to help others. I remember her willingness to serve.

She didn’t just give me the shirt off her back, she gave me life. I wish I could share it with her.

Incredibly LOST.

2010-03-26T13:18:00.000-07:00

I’m a big fan of the television show LOST. I also like to wait for my TV shows to come out on DVD before I watch them. This normally makes me a season or two behind on what is currently being aired. So, luckily, if you are watching LOST on TV this post contains no spoilers. If you don’t watch LOST but would like to in the future, don’t keep reading, because heavy spoiling and whining will ensue. (Right now I’m on season 4 of LOST.)

How I love the two men in the pic above my post. Sayid. Desmond. Mmm. I don’t know what it is about these actors, but they make me love them. I think it is also obvious that they probably shouldn't; they’re sweaty, hairy, crazy, and their characters keep getting weirder!!

Is anyone keeping up with the plot? I need a LOST for dummies book. Every episode brings up 10 more questions for me that seem to never get answered.

What is the black mist? Why was there a comic book with a polar bear and Walt? Who is Jacob? Why is time travel becoming part of the show? Why did they have to kill off Charlie and is the owner of the “rescue” boat a bad guy? Why does Kate have Aaron? Why does Jack want to go back to the Island? What is happening to poor Desmond? Who does Locke think he is? Why is everyone clean shaven? Why is no one killing Ben? Why can't I kill Ben?

Is anyone else having this love/hate relationship? Why do I keep watching this show??

I’ll tell you why; geek is in my soul and anything that is weird or insane seems to sing to me. “Watch me”, the crazy weird show lures…and I listen.

MAIL

2010-03-18T14:37:00.000-07:00

Does anyone...

still write hand written letters?

keep wedding invites, because one day down the road you might use that same color scheme?

collect boxes and bags and laundry baskets full of paper bills because you pay online but your too scared to stop the paper trail?

tear up bills and stick small pieces of the letter into different trash bins so you might confuse an identity thief - you know just in case?

keep letters from friends that they don't even talk to anymore or even really like for the matter?

have a secret box to hold all of your most precious letters?

keep Christmas cards from the people you love and never look at them again?

stash invites from miscellaneous get togethers because you like to collect them?

write thank you letters and never send them?

have letters sent to more than one address because you haven't updated your current residence in quite a while?

remember when you were a kid and getting a piece of mail made you feel incredible?

write letters in rough drafts and never send them?

open a letter from the side instead of the top?

wish that someone from your past would contact you?

write more rough drafts and throw them away?

place stamps upside down? (It means "I love you.")

pray that you write the recipients address correctly and beautifully so you don't have to open the envelope and start over?

wish that you could get letters from heaven; just like on Saturday's Warriors?

want an address book but never updates it and doesn't know how to start collecting addresses?

Me too.

Job opening

2010-03-12T12:12:00.000-08:00

Hello all,

I just wanted to let you know that FedEx at my call center is hiring. It's a good job and we rarely hire. If you know anyone that is looking let them know!!

They have to apply online at Fedex.com (careers)

Feel free to ask me questions if you have any.

Thanks!!
Sariah

Sariah in Wonderland

2010-03-05T23:08:00.000-08:00

I love Alice in Wonderland!!

I remember when I was a little girl twirling in front of the tv while the roses sang and the tulips swayed in harmony. I giggled as the Mad Hatter got overly excited about some one's un-birthday. I felt the stress as the white rabbit CONSTANTLY kept pushing Alice through time. I watched in wonder when the Caterpillar blew out puffs of letters. My head bobbled from side to side while the cards waddled and danced while painting the roses red. I was scared for the little oysters that were to become the Walrus' dinner. I stretched my smile as the Cheshire cat teased Alice through the hard times. I wanted to fast forward the stupidity of Tweetle-dee and tweetle-dumb as they made honking noises - Man, I hated those idiots.

Thirteen years later the story picks up in Tim Burton's rendition of Alice in Wonderland. The critics did not seem to like it. I heard how the scenery was too loud and the that actors couldn't keep up. (I snort in the direction of this statement. Nothing out does Johnny Depp or Helena Bonham Carter.)I heard that this movie was an insult to Mr. Lewis Carroll; in the fact that it did not relate to his novels besides the characters. I also heard that the 3D was bad because it didn't invite the audience into the movie. To these educated and honorable movie critics I have one Question. Did you even watch the movie.

It was wonderful. It was a perfect movie that has beautiful scenes, amazing actors, a great screen play, fabulous CGI, and I have to mention the thing that keep my complete interest and stirred loving feelings in me that I have never dreamed I would feel...the clothing. Every piece of fabric was perfect. All of the pearls, scarves, beading, silks, and cords were perfectly placed. Every article of clothing was a perfect example of my dream wardrobe. If I could dress that way, every day and not be thought a lunatic, I would.

Tim Burton is a mastermind.

I'm sure that everyone has been asked the question "If you could have dinner with anyone dead or alive, who would it be?", well my answer is simple. It would be Mr. Burton. I'd want him to pick out the entire table scheme, the atmosphere, the music, the food, and even my outfit. I absolutely love him and his amazing talented wife. (I guess she could come for dinner too. :)

Please go and see this movie. It is essential for a creative mind to see.

The blessing of singledom

2010-02-22T14:42:00.000-08:00

Although this picture looks like a vision out of my Sariah-waking-up-happily-married-to-fox-of-a-man daydream; I find my self enjoying the picture and moving on.

Just lately, I have not been having the daydreams that show me as getting married in the "insert the temple of your dreams here" or dreaming about the bundle of children I will have one day. (odd how some look like Ewan Mcgregor – the other, LL Cool J) I haven't even been imagining about never having to work again and spending my days going to the park with my family.

Nope, not one of these daydreams has been entertaining my thoughts for the past few months.

My imaginings are of a more of a solitary nature.

I dream of the day that I can become a published and an acclaimed author. I even urn for the day that I can own my own place that is clean and can have as many feminine touches that my heart desires. I’m excited for the uncountable days of waking up diagonally across my bed, all of the covers selfishly surrounding me, and not worrying about bad breath until I actually am forced to leave my house.

These beautiful and delicious thoughts have truly been filling my every wish.

Yes, I want to get married and have the entire children/house/pet package. But it seems as thought my heart has been pushing this end into a much later future than I had previously desired.

I love being able to go out when ever I want and only having to pay for one dinner/ticket/souvenir- not two. I don’t have to worry about car seats, dirty diapers, and babysitters. I don’t have to wait for a man to bring home the bacon. (I’m allergic to it anyways.) I get to watch the movies that I want to watch. Bathe when I want to relax. Clean - and have it stay clean. I order what I want on the pizza of my choice. My music selection is always playing. I get the best seat in the house. I get to pray and read and get ready in peace.

I’m sure; if the time comes for me to get married I will be ecstatic.
But until then, I am enjoying being #1. Hallelujah.

Memories of Noodle

2010-02-03T09:43:00.000-08:00

Mr. Noodle is a character off of Elmo's World, a very loved TV show of Chase Fisher. Chase was a boy that I nannied for about 2 years. He was the cutest little guy with such a sweet temperament. It was a sad time for him with his parents going through a divorce and then neither one of them being home...ever. Our favorite game was when he would get on my back and I would run around the house slapping the walls right before I ran into them. Trust me, I know it doesn't sound too fun, but his intense high giggles made it the best game ever. To settle down we would sit on the couch, eat dinner (which normally had a course of gummy bears), and watch Mr. Oooodle.

I love white-trashy-food. My friend Meaggie taught me how to make a noodle burrito. Mmmm. (Also, very healthy.) lol. Step 1. take a package of ramen and open one end. Fill this half way up with warm water and let soak. Step 2. slowly make sure that all of the noodles become al dente. Step 3. drain water. Step 4. Add seasoning and mix in with a fork-trying to get it evenly coated. Step 5. Push noodles down into the package into a rectangle shape. Step 6. roll the excess package over until you have a tight roll. Step 7. sit on it for 15-30 minutes. (ha.) Step 8. heat in the microwave and remove from package or take it out or package and roll in tin foil - roast on a campfire. I laughed when she told me about the ramen burrito-then I tried it. It's super yummy on a camp fire.

The band Gorillaz has a virtual band; their in that said band is my favorite character, Noodle. She is freaking awesome, RIP. (Her pic is above) The lead singer of the band draws his characters and they regularly star in his music videos and decorate his cd covers. I love the song Feel Good Inc and Clint Eastwood.

Cranberry Orange Chicken over a bed of noodles was the first dish that Greg cooked for our family. Lera's husband Greg was pulled from a Singles Ward parking lot, by our mother, and invited over for dinner. He thought it was cool that we all had dinner together and offered to cook the next time he came over. At the time he worked at Albertson's. He bought a cook book and the required ingredients and made us all dinner. It wasn't the best dinner... But we all treasure Greg in our family. From the first Sunday dinner he cooked to the current ones, Sunday's wouldn't be as fun as they are now with out my Bro Greg.

The best scene of Lady and the Tramp was when they are sitting together and eating spaghetti. The noodle - what a simple tool that Walt Disney thought of to bring them together as a couple. awww.

My mom used to take me and Lera to the Hunter High School swimming pool to play. We loved to swim growing up. I remember how they would always have the floating boards to help us paddle our way across the pool. I also remember the very rare and ultra colorful pool noodles. I envied the kids that had them as I had my rubber band colored board. They floated in the pool like colorful sprinkles on top of a water cake. The boards were good to stand on and try to stay up, but the pool noodles, oh those pool noodles had endless possibilities. You could sit, jump rope, seesaw, rocking horse, rainbow, snake, and balance beam across the pool. Pure innocent magic.

Red Robin is a restaurant that my best friend Shea and I visit a lot. On the wall in the hallway as the waiter takes us to our seat, I pass my favorite Red-Robin-Poster. Different types of noodles and how they all differ in appearance. My favorite type of noodle is the bow-tie or Farfalle pasta.

Word.

2010-02-02T12:00:00.000-08:00

Last year I saw my friend Alice make a post about her word for the year. It's a word to lead you through the year and remind you what to focus on. When I saw it I really wanted to blog about it!! Of course I forgot.

This year, dear Alice, had continued the word of the year. Luckily I was reminded by her post and this time I'm not going to forget to blog my personal word of the year.

My resolutions this year are very spherical and don't really have any designated out come. I simply want to be better this year. Better at everything. Small and strong growth that will become a permanent part of my being. With my resolutions, that are written down over 3 entire pages, I realized the perfect word for me this year.

Anew.

A tip of the hat to the Online Webster's Dictionary to give it's perfect definitions;
1 : for an additional time : again begin anew
2 : in a new or different form a story told anew on film

I like the old me, she's defiantly staying, but it's time for the old me to marinade in something other than the past. It's time to add new life. New passions. New soul.

Leaving 2009

2010-01-31T15:06:00.000-08:00

My sister Lera tagged me on this 2009 recap and it's a good thing; I have had the hardest time thinking up new blog ideas. Here we go...

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before? I saw the Statue of Liberty for my first time. It was amazing.
2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Only one was kept; I travelled more. I had a trip to Disneyland and New York. This year I have made a ton of resolutions. Let's see how I do.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? The two that I'm very close to were my sister Lera and my good friend Jamie.
4. Did anyone close to you die? No, thankfully.
5. What countries did you visit? None, that will hopefully change in the next few years.
6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009? A better self-esteem and a small amount of debt.
7. What date from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory and why? Emily and Jenn's wedding day. Also, my little nephew Brody was born.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? surviving.
9. What was your biggest failure? Not living life passionately.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Last year was a harsh year for depression.
11. What was the best thing you bought? Tour tickets in New York. Thanks for finding it London!! Also, I bought my first Black dress.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? All of my close friends and family were amazing, however, I would really like to focus on my nephew Trevor. He really has become such a smart little guy. He is such a character.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? this is not a nice question...
14. Where did most of your money go? Vacations, credit card bills, and eating out
15. What did you really, really, really get excited about? I know that this is going to sound lame, but I love books and there were a lot of good reads this year.
16. What song will always remind you of 2009? Feeling Good- Muse
17. Compared to this time last year are you: Happier? This year was a hard one for me to feel happy. Thinner? No, ha. Richer? Sadly, I've lived paycheck to paycheck...
18. What do you wish you’d done more of? service
19. What do you wish you’d done less of? eat
20. How did you spend Christmas? sleeping in and family time
21. How will you be spending New Years? I spent it at my pal Alice's house with her family and Rookie.
22. Did you fall in love in 2009? not so much.
23. How many one-night stands? Zero.
24. What was your favorite TV program? Chuck
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? I don't hate anyone.
26. What was the best book you read? Two. The Peacegiver and Catching Fire
27. What was your biggest musical discovery? Sia!! How I love her urban soul voice.
28. What did you want and you got? A new TV
29. What did you want and not get? A bigger paycheck
30. What was your favorite film of this year? Probably Star Trek, however, I saw North and South for my first time in 2009. That is a great movie!!
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old did you turn? Family dinner and I turned 25
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? If I had become more active/strong in the church.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009? Dark colors with colorful accessories.
34. What kept you sane? My sisters and amazing friends
35. Which celebrity did you fancy the most? I love Ewan, Richard Armitage is freaking awesome.
36. What political issue stirred you the most? The economy
37. Who did you miss? My mom, so much, and my friend Jenn- she moved to New York :(
38. Who was the best new person you met? Brody
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009: forgiveness and appreciation
40. Quote or Song Lyric that sums up your year: Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

I want to tag Lisa, Rookie, and Sam. Have at it girls!

Updating my personal favorites...

2010-01-24T21:02:00.000-08:00

designer- Kenneth Cole, Burberry Britt, & Vera Wang
painter- James C. Christensen
makeup brand- MAC
perfume- Burberry Britt
men's cologne- Kenneth Cole
shoe maker- D&G, Sergio Rossi, & many, many others.
kind of hat- Cabby hat
Animal- Camels, llamas, and owls
superhero- superman
bird- black bird
flower- Lilies and poppies
tree- weeping willow
playground equipment- swing
penny candy- Swedish fish
favorite take-out- Chinese
best fries- leatherby's cheese fries
best shake- Hometown Shakes in Garden City
favorite smoothie flavor- Aloha Pineapple
favorite fruit- blueberry
favorite vegetable- anything green
favorite restaurant meal- sushi
comfort food- mac and cheese
favorite day of the week- Saturday
favorite vacation spot- Washington
lucky number- 3
board game- Loaded Questions and Ticket to Ride
tv show- Chuck
reality tv show- Biggest Loser
shape- Triangle
poem- weep you no more, sad fountains
video game- I suck at them all but I like to watch them. That's even more lame.
food- spicy
sport- bowling
color- Brown
holiday- Halloween
website- Facebook
store- Barnes and Noble
subject- Creative Writing
book- Sense and Sensibility
movie- Big Fish
collection- scarves
drink- Diet Coke
song- imagine, black bird, hallelujah, and Feeling Good
band- Muse
chick flick- The Holiday
teen fiction- The Hunger Games, Harry Potter, and The Host
Actress- Kate Winslet and Ginnifer Goodwin
Actor- Ewan Mcgregor
occupation- writer

whirlwind of thoughts

2010-01-22T07:53:00.000-08:00

1. I can't decide what to blog about.

2. I am so grateful for my job in such hard financial times. Now all I need to do is start spending my money wisely.

3. I really get stressed out over car and computer issues. Right now both are working great (knock on wood, twice) and I do appreciate that. I don't just notice the bad incidences, I'm noticing the good ones. Alice, (My cars name.) your smooth riding has been a miraculous thing as of late. I love that I can depend on you to get to and from work even when the gas light is on. Bean, (My 'puter's name. I know, I have a name for my computer...) thank you so much for keeping my book-in-progress safe!! Even through that nasty viral worm and not so modest SPAM pop ups, you've stuck in there.

4. I also love romantic period movies. Oh, Richard, your acting in North and South truly makes me swoon. I love you!! And BTW, I would have looked back at you.

5. I can't decide what color my hair is going to be dyed. I like the dark but I think it's time for a change. I miss the days in school when I would have every color of the rainbow. I'm trying to be more modest - I have to remind myself.

6. I really want an entire chocolate brown leather living room set. Over my life I have sat in many brown leather chairs and yearned to take them home with me. The comfort one feels in a nice brown leather chair is probably comparable to sitting in a celestial cloud. Just saying.

7. I truly love my nephews. I need to make more time to hang with them.

8. My favorite job was Blockbuster. I am a total movie buff and I loved working with the crazy/cool/nerdy people there. If you ever need a wake up call to interesting personalities, get a job at Blockbuster.

9. I think some people need to come off their high horse. Self righteous know-it-alls need to back the freak off me. I am so tired of people looking down their nose at me because they think they are... smarter/cuter/wiser/skinner/richer/married/"perfect". Seriously, my dears, you are just as imperfect as I am. It's time to wake up and smell the reality. There is a big difference between being a friend and giving wise advice and being a jerk.

10. I LOVE my sisters. Lera- you complete me. lol. You really are such an amazing women. You, even in the worst of time, prove to be so dedicated to me. I appreciate your constant support and love. London- I have never met anyone that could match your passion for life. You are such a great example on how to be happy in a poopy world. You are always so kind to me, I'd have to say more than I deserve. You two are power-houses. Positive examples. I am so proud to call you two my sisters.

11. I love comic book movies, violent ones, epic wars, dumb humor, anime, and sci-fi. Now all I need is a guy to watch them with. :)

12. I'm so grateful that blogspot is a website I can visit on my work breaks. If not- I might never blog. I also get to read all of my favorite blog pages at work. I check them about 3 times a day. I'm a major stalker.

13. I waste a lot of hours surfing the ksl classifieds. I love looking at everything and I want to buy most of it. I wish I owned a truck so I could haul the things I want.

14. I have thought about trading my car in for a truck. I love them. I love how high they are, I love the bed, I love the power under the hood. I don't love the payments or the gas. Those two things I could live with out.

15. I love drinking Diet Coke for breakfast. Case closed.

16. I can't stand my handwriting. It embarrasses me. I have to rewrite my to do lists over and over because I can't stand looking at it.

17. I love flowers and foliage and trees and rocks and fog and mists and rain. At work when I need a breather I look at the ol' google image and search for random things. X-ray flowers are my new obsession. I also love Tim Burton-ish trees. <3

18. I'm not as girly as I wish to be, but I so love bows in my hair. I love putting clips and headbands that lash out wildly against my frizzy hair. I would love to have a closet full of hair stuff!!

19. I secretly have a binder full of things I would want in my future wedding. Oops. I let the secret out there. I know what type of dress I want, hair, shoes, cake, wedding song play list... I'm a freak. It's probably the only thing I have remotely organized in my life. It's also likely I might not be able to use it.

20. It is time to do a super spring cleaning. Everything I own is littered everywhere. I don't need all of this stuff. Soon EBAY, KSL, and the DI are going to be full of my stuff.

21. I'm heart broken for the people in Haiti.

22. Debt is an evil horrible demon. I know it's my fault. I know I made my own bed. I know that debt never sleeps. I've heard it all. Sadly just hearing it has obviously not made a dent in my small overspending mind.

23. Friends are amazing. There isn't much that can top a loyal, loving, and kind friend.

24. I don't think that I have worn matching socks in over a month. I have all sizes and colors of black and white. It seems that none have a match. But I still can't throw the odd ones away. Maybe, in the next few weeks, the dyer will give them back to me.

25. I have over 36,000 words in my book. I'm so proud of what I've done but I still have so much more to write. I'm nervous it's going to be crap. I'm scared of the many grammar/continuity/plot mistakes I have made. People are so harsh. I am too harsh on myself.

My 3 day weekend - highlights

2010-01-10T21:31:00.000-08:00

Friday: I took work off and spent the day sleeping, writing, and cleaning some house. I wanted to be able to relax and taking this day off helped me out big time. Getting enough sleep really does make life so much better. I'm at 31,400 words in my novel. I'm already in love with it's characters and I can't wait for the day that I can read more about them.

Saturday: I watched my very loved nephew Palmer. He is so happy. I just love every piece of his adoreble personality. We played a very funny game of Palmer humming me to sleep, (as the picture above details) we learned how to baa like a sheep, and we laughed at hotdogs and the funny ways we can eat them. He really is the cutest thing ever. I'm so grateful for his reminders on how life can be such a wonderful place to be.
I read an entire book called Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief. It was an extremely easy read and very entertaining. While reading about Poseidon I thought how it would be a very cool name for a fish. I saw a betta in my head and I remembered how much I loved having fish. I went to PetsMart at 9 pm and bought my Poseidon. I love him.

Sunday: We had a delicious greek dinner, with indian rice and glueten free cupcakes, all provided by my sister London in celebration of her hubby's birthday. Shea brought her boyfriend McWayne over and I finally got to meet him face to face. He is a great guy for my bud Shea. I think that they compliment each other perfectly.

Sunday Dinners aka Allergy Awareness

2009-12-22T06:18:00.000-08:00

What you see is a crispy, smokey, and salty piece of bacon. What I see is a night spent in the bathroom wishing I've never touched the fried strips of meat of which smell lingers in your hair longer than burnt popcorn.

I am allergic to pork. When I tell people this I normally get one reply..."That's awful!" People give me looks of sympathy and then this questions normally follows; "But don't you miss bacon?" No, I don't. I don't really remember what it tastes like, I don't appreciate the fleshy smell, and turkey bacon is delicious.

Being allergic to pork has some minor set backs. On Sunday dinners when my family gets together we have to prepare a meal that suits everyone. This is not an easy feat.

My families allergies, including food we dislike, to show the difficulties and high maintenance of our family dinners:

Me: I'm allergic to pork and all pork products. I hate beans that aren't green. I also will not eat pastries or custards (Lemon bars, pies, flaky things, cobbler, or any dutch oven dessert...shudder.) I also am not a big fan of potatoes other than mashed or fried.

Lera: She's allergic to garlic. She doesn't like Seafood. She hates Reese's Cups and she will not touch yogurt. She also is not a fan of weird veggies like Lima beans and mushrooms. She is big on texture.

Greg: He doesn't like mushrooms.

Palmer: Used to be allergic to strawberries but he's out grown that.

Brody: He doesn't like formula or when his mommy eats bean burritos.

London: Is allergic to garlic. She gets sick to her stomach if she even touches eggs. Asparagus disgusts her. She will cannot even handle the smell of Mustard. She hates condiments. Oh, and she also will not eat cheap food. (Ramen, tomato soup, cheap chocolate...)

Monte: He has Celiac disease, which means he can't eat protein gluten, which is found in bread, pasta, cookies, pizza crust and many other foods containing wheat, barley or rye. This is in almost everything.

Braedon: He also has Celiac disease. :( He doesn't like to eat anything that takes time. He doesn't like pickles.

Trevor: Doesn't like meat. Actually, he doesn't like anything that isn't a carb.

Davis: Is a picky eater. He normally doesn't like anything that Trevor likes.

Dad/Papi: Allergic to garlic. He also gets sick from turkey. He can't eat white onions and he cannot eat cafe-rio-style anything.

Betty: Does not like olives.

Greg, Betty, and Palmer are our champs. And we all love to eat Sunday dinners, but with all of us, it's pretty interesting to find something to share.

Are you allergic to anything? Are there foods that you refuse to eat?

Today I feel like this...

2009-12-16T09:40:00.000-08:00

I'm not stupid enough that I would blog about something I shouldn't, i.e. work issues, personal debt, friend issues, and feelings about things that I am NOT OK with.

I want to keep my job. I love my friends. I know that I'm in the wrong when I'm not able to forgive other's on something that they probably didn't mean to say. I know that I am a daughter of God - that I have potential.

But some days you just need a cry. Sometimes a tantrum is needed to keep you sane.

The Finale

2009-11-30T18:42:00.000-08:00

The end of a goal is normally the sweetest part. You've finished, you've succeeded. But at the end of NaBloPoMo I find myself at a stand still. I literally am at a complete loss for a post idea. With there being so many things going on in the world and I'm still having blogger's block, the ending seems to be anticlimactic. Unfinished.

Is today really November 30th? Did my favorite season, Fall, just pass away? Am I about to go back into a blogging dry spell?

Both of my breaks at work were spent in front of my computer. I was surfing google images trying to have something light an idea into blaze. Something to get the creative juices flowing, but alas, nothing. I wasted 30 minutes of much needed break time at my computer. A place that my job has to pay me to stay.

A few people at my work find it odd that I blog. They say things like "what do you blog about when your single" or "Wow, that is really lame". There is some teasing to what they say but some truth as well. What do I blog about??

Before I left work I looked back over the last month and I saw something I didn't notice before. I saw my likes and dislikes, my love for my mother, music that swells in my soul, books that have touched my heart, traditions of old and new, foods that my Mother and Sisters taught me to cook, poetry, opinions on how the world does or should work, and goals that were met. I also saw me...in the written form. Rie, broken into words and emotions. The writer, who isn't completely talented, but has the heart for the job. Maybe this is the big ending of November. I get to see everything that I've written about.

Driving home from work I took notice of the beautiful lights that were starting to appear more and more as night wore in. Christmas lights glowed colorful and enchanting on house trims and trees. Traffic lights danced with interchanging color. Living rooms lit up as families sat down for their dinners. Street lights glowing like a celestial orbs. Porch lights clicked on to let someone know that they had loved ones waiting to see them. The moon started to rise above the mountains. I knew that these lights were my "finale", my personal fireworks followed me the whole way home, congratulating me.

Fairy Tales

2009-11-29T17:54:00.000-08:00

I truly am a sucker for fairy tales. I remember growing up in Ohio, sitting on my little chicken stool watching The Little Mermaid over and over. I wanted to be Ariel as she walked out of the ocean in her sparkly slinky dress. When I was in the hospital, waiting for my foot to heal, I watched as Aurora woke up after the worst day of her life to her prince kissing her softly. I smiled when Belle read to Beast in his majestic library. I had a tear in my eye when the Nation of China all bowed to Mulan, as they recognized the women who saved them.

I really enjoy Shannon Hales beautifully written novels. Her books are youth readers that are extremely easy to read and completely original. She gives a brand new spin for fairy tales that have delicious multi-layered stories to her characters. I love reading her lyrical vocabulary that seams to weave throughout her writing. Her novel, Princess Academy, didn't let me down.

Young Miri was born premature and grew up unable to be normal in a village full of laborers. Miri is shocked when her small village finds out that some girl among them will be the future princess. All eligible girls must attend princess academy to prepare for a royal life. Miri is confused by which life is meant for her; a royal life where she might fit in but is unknown or a hard worker's life in a village that she loves.

I have also read "Book of a Thousand Days" (my favorite Shannon Hale) were a young maid named Dasti helps her princess find her fairy tale ending. Dasti is surprised to also be going through her own love story.

I love these types of stories and I hope that I can read many more. Let me know if you have any recommendations.

Sick in Bed

2009-11-29T17:38:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I started to get sick, really sick. I can't breathe. I can't sleep. I can't cough away an itch in my throat. My nose is leaking, but I still can't blow it. My muscles hurt.

But there is a plus to this...I have all of the DVD's I just bought on Black Friday plus a never ending cable feed of movies

So far I have watched; Australia, Taken, Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Oceans Twelve, Land of the Lost, Father of the Bride, and Bride Wars. For those reading this; it means that I have watched approximately 16 hours of movies in two days.

The sad thing is that I'm still exhausted and now I add a headache to the list of not feeling good. I guess crying the whole way through Australia and Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants doesn't help you feel better.

Black Friday

2009-11-27T17:31:00.000-08:00

My sister's and I are Black Friday Pros. Every Thanksgiving night we plot through the ads and map out our shopping coarse. We set our alarms and hope that we digest all of the turkey we had for dinner. We arrive before the door opens at the best store and wait among the other money spending athletes. Running shoes are laced. Coats are zipped. Caffeine and adrenaline rushing though every vein.

I have provided my TOP 10 ways to do Black Friday shopping.

1. Coupons and Free items come first. Make sure that you are not only getting the best deals, but also getting a killer deal. Example: Getting new towels for $2.20 each from the Black Friday special - then the $10 off coupon is presented - plus an additional 15% off - then getting back the gift card coupons to shop in the future.

2. Using the "line-saver"method. Once the first person is done shopping they stand in line and hold every one's spot. Trick for using this method...You have to talk to the person behind you and warn them. "My friends are on the way- I wonder if they are looking for me on the other side of the store" works wonders. Also, if you get near the front of the line and your shopping partners aren't ready, this is when you let 5-10 people in front of you. This is also called back-butting.

3. Parking by a curb side when the Wal-mart parking lot has no vacancies. It keeps you out of the the line waiting for people to come out of the store to leave and it also provides fast get-a-way time.

4. Having someone dropped off mid-parking lot to find a random cart that someone left after they've unloaded. Caution to the wise: don't attempt to take a cart with someone just standing by it- even if they look uninterested. They have obviously marked that one as their personal property and will defend it until death.

5. Divide and concur. Know what you want before you hit the stores. If there are more people in your group that want the same thing, split into smaller packs and hunt it down. Or, if every one wants different things resort to #2.

6. Go to stores that have opening hours in successions or availability. Kohl's 4 AM... Wal-mart, always...Big lots 6 AM...Target, always...Roberts 7 AM...

7. Find out which stores ad match and use that one location until it bleeds dry. Honestly, you will never know if the next store will still have what you want. If your looking at it - get it. Pride for your savings will follow.

8. Re-fuel!! After you have gotten the majority of your "I MUST HAVE THIS" item, go to breakfast with your group. Relax a little bit and take a yummy break to get your body ready for the next batch of adventures. Black Friday is a marathon people, not a sprint.

9. Rain checks are amazing. If you know a store will do rain checks, wait to go shopping their later. This way you still can get the price you want but you don't have to spend money today. However, make sure that you do get the rain check between the hours that the sale is on. You don't want to waste your time standing in line for the clerk to say "Sorry, that ended and hour ago."

10. Laugh, have fun, and be nice to the people working. The whole reason of going shopping on Black Friday is to feel the magic that only happens there. People are there to make their wish lists come true. The are shopping for loved ones and spending time with Friends and family. When the lady behind you is shoving the front of her cart into your rear trying to push you forward in the line - shrug it off. Your not "that person" to get mad on Black Friday. You're the pro... you got this.

It's Turkey Day!!

2009-11-26T12:12:00.000-08:00

I love Thanksgiving!! I love the family, friends, food, and the ads for shopping the next day. I am so excited to celebrate and have a fun 4 day weekend.

I'm so grateful for so many things!!

My job, adorable NEPHEWS, My amazing sisters, the gospel, my friends, for having a home, my car, being able to have electricity, for being a U.S. citizen, for having an eternal family, books and movies, to have food and never go hungry, the scriptures, and for having laughter in my life.

I wanted to include something to watch for the start of the winter holidays that went with this small blog. I debated between Adam Sandler's Turkey song, a scene from While you were Sleeping, and a photo montage of ways different people celebrate. I finally decided to go with something that perfectly fits my humor... hope you enjoy!!

'Rieting time' creative writing poem

2009-11-26T12:00:00.000-08:00

In my creative writing class in High School we had a project of taking a song that we loved and write within that rhythm. This is still one of my favorite classes that I took. I love music and I love writing. I got the rhythm for the below poem from a little band called Incubus.

The song is called "Nice to know you".

blessed than watching the stars becoming liver tombs
blessed than witnessing radiating blue in the moon
he who lies gets captured like a fly, and still you sting
hypocrisy spies into your supplies, but yet you bring
I'd never thought I'd feel this way
I've never had the will to try
regretting having not my seals
i disregard and peel the feel, i need to show you

leaner than the leanest grass that would ever grow
brighter than the brightest ray of light we'd ever seen to know
better he with the keys to the handle that opens the door
a higher sight to see these canyons as a tiled floor
i'd never thought i'd feel this way
i've never had the will to try
regretting having not my seals
i disregard and peel the feel, i need to show you

love and letters

2009-11-26T11:08:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite things in the world is love letters. I remember while I was growing up my Mom and Dad would always leave a letter for each other. My dad would get home from work and read Mom's letters and then he would write one of his own at the bottom of the page. Then when she would wake up, she'd read how his day was. Their letters where always signed with the XO at the bottom. An "I love you" was also normally written somewhere on the page. Simple. Powerful. I remember thinking how amazing my parents were. Something tangible of how their love didn't falter.

When I was in High School I read about a house in Verona, Italy, claiming to be the Capulets' home. The side view shows the famous balcony where Romeo compared his Juliet to the Sun. In the small courtyard, a bronze statue of Juliet baring her breast. There is a legend that if a person strokes the breast of the statue, that person will have good fortune in love.

Do you notice how shiny her right breast and arm from the tourists touching and hugging her. Behind her on the stone walls are tons of love letters that are hung from the tourists that have visited the spot.

Going to this courtyard is on the "must do in my life" list. I am in awe of this romantic spot and I hope that someday soon I can visit, see, and feel this amazing place. I hope that until then, Juliet Capulet will still send some fortune my way.

James C. Christensen

2009-11-25T14:37:00.000-08:00

I absolutely love art and my favorite artist is a modern one, James C. Christensen. His paintings and drawings literally make my spirit dance. I love the colors that stain across the canvas. I love the proportions of the subjects expressions and clothing. He really does make a flat picture become a living object.

I really suggest that you look him up. James C. Christensen normally paints with fantasy themes. But he also has a collection of religious work. I love his painting of the Widows Mite and the 10 Lepers.

He also has collections of fairy tales and even William Shakespeare. I was lucky enough to be able to meet him this summer. I got him to sign my copy of "A Shakespeare Sketchbook" which includes some amazing characters and landscaping from the impressions that Shakespeare leaves in our imagination. The cover of the book has a painting of Titania, the beautiful queen of the fairies. She is sitting next to Nick Bottom, who has been transformed into a donkey, who she loves because her husband magically-induced her out of revenge.

Post #100 - Write on!!

2009-11-24T09:48:00.001-08:00

I can't believe it took me this long to get to post 100 on my blog, however, at the same time I am impressed that I actually stuck to it. I'm so grateful for the amazing things that this blog has helped me appreciate in my life.

I can find things to blog about that I wouldn't be able to write any where else, even though I have the selection...

Journal entries were never my thing. I have about 20 journals- all with about 30 pages in each one are written on and the rest are left blank and unused. I am the "jot the thought and leave" type of girl.

I also have a dream diary next to my bed. During the restless or creative dreams in the night I am grateful for my pillow book friend. Then the morning comes and excitement warms my face with a big smile even before I open my eyes - I reach for the diary to see what amazing ideas I had the night before. The book cracks open and I flip through the pages to find the newest additions. My smile usually explodes into laughter as I read things like "The kitty litter gloves" or "Taco seasoning in the rain" or "myst-tear-rios door in the forest by the Red path"

My lap top is becoming the safe for my novel in progress. I love my novel and the characters in it. Even if it never gets published or finished, it's mine and it’s supporting the author in me - showing me that I might make it. I see the pages move and grow as they take shape. Just like watching clouds drift in the sky. “Look what you can do” the screen says to me, patting me on the back.

I am a list maker. I write down the things I need to do or the things I have or stuff I need to look for. I have lists of things to clean, which hasn't been updated in weeks. I have lists in my purse for the grocery store. I have lists of the movies I own. I email spreadsheets of lists at work. A list of the things I want to do before I die sits in my desk collecting dust. A entire folder of lists of things I would like for the wedding I might never get to celebrate. I have lists of bills to pay and lists of money I don't have. I have a list of Harry Potter projects to unload from our party. I even watch a constantly growing want list on EBay.

My poems are a collection of my feelings, rants, and musings of random thoughts. I collect them all. I write in all types of ways to keep my creative writing in a smooth flow. I keep them in binders and drawers and closet corners.

I have a box of letters that I love to read and ones that I've written and never sent. It's a box of words. Oh how I love a hand written letter!! I love how different every one's vocabulary and penmanship is.

I maintain this blog. I don’t have many readers, but I’m here. At 100 posts I continue to get stronger as a writer. Every time it’s gets read or commented on, my blog shoves me to keep going.

Chicken Enchiladas

2009-11-22T00:35:00.000-08:00

My family loves food and we love to cook. We go through many recipes until we find the best ones and then we stick to them. We don't fool around people.

I know that I have been running behind on the blog posts for November. So, my thought was to post some of my families best recipes for a specific food. Seriously, once you try these ones, you won't want any other recipe. MMmmmm,mmm. Not only do these posts help me stay up on my goal, but I know that sharing these Delicious dishes will make the Internet a better place for NaBloPoMo.

1 pkg. tortillas (8-10)
2-3 c. boneless, skinless cubed chicken (boiled in chicken bouillon)
16 oz. sour cream
1 sm. can green chilies
1 c. mayonnaise
1 sm. can sliced olives
1 can cream of chicken soup
1 lb. shredded cheddar cheese (1/2 reserved)
1/2 c. salsa
1/8 c. finely chopped onion
1 lg. can enchilada sauce (green or red)

Preheat over to 350 degrees. Mix all ingredients but tortilla shells, enchilada sauce and half of the cheese. Fill tortilla shells with mixture. Bake for 1 hour. Pour enchilada sauce over the top; sprinkle with cheese, and return to the over for another 15 minutes.

Cake Mix Cookies

2009-11-22T00:32:00.000-08:00

1 pkg. cake mix
½ c. flour
½ c. oil
¼ c. water
1 egg
1 c. chocolate chips or other add-in

Mix all ingredients together. Spoon into balls on cookie sheet. Bake at 350 degrees for 10-12 minutes.

Easy Tuna Casserole

2009-11-22T00:28:00.000-08:00

3 c. uncooked macaroni
2 cans cream of chicken soup
1 can tuna
1 c. shredded cheddar cheese
1 c. french fried onions

Cook macaroni. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. In 9x13 casserole dish combine macaroni, tuna, and soup. Bake 25 minutes. Sprinkle with onions and bake 5 minutes more.

German Pancakes

2009-11-22T00:26:00.000-08:00

1 stick butter
1 dozen eggs
2 c. milk
1 c. flour

Melt butter in 9x13 casserole dish. Blend eggs, milk, and flour. Pour mixture into pan and bake at 450 degrees for 20 minutes. Serve with syrup and/or powdered sugar.

Banana Nut Bread with Chocolate Chips

2009-11-22T00:20:00.000-08:00

1 cup sugar
1/2 cup shortening
2 eggs
2 cups flour
1/2 cup walnut chips
1 teaspoon baking soda
3 soft, ripe bananas, mashed
1 cup chocolate chips

Cream sugar and shortening; add eggs, flour, baking soda, bananas, nuts and chocolate chips. Pour batter into a greased and floured loaf pan. Bake at 325 degrees for about 1 hour and 15 minutes. Check after an hour, and every subsequent 5-10 minutes, until toothpick comes out clean when poked in the center.

Random Beloved Poem

2009-11-17T14:33:00.000-08:00

Why is being single such an embarrassing thing? My sister Lera said that she heard some very prominent LDS women give talks and that during their talks they spoke of how hard it is to be single. No one laughed at them. They weren't judged and pointed at. They didn't have to stand on a pedestal under a spot light and be ridiculed. They were open about the hardships of single hood. I'm sure in that openness they were able to find some Peace in the trial.

I personally feel embarrassed; Like I've done something wrong or I'm not good enough. I've built these protective layers around me that let people think that I'm happy being single.
My close friends and family know that this is not the case, but there would never be a situation that I could stand in front of others and tell them my true feelings about it.

Why is this??

Because I have a fear of public speaking I've decided to blog about my feelings. Nothing could say exactly what I feel more than this beautiful poem by Maya Angelou.

Touched by An Angel

We, unaccustomed to courage
exiles from delight
live coiled in shells of loneliness
until love leaves its high holy temple
and comes into our sight
to liberate us into life.

Love arrives
and in its train come ecstasies
old memories of pleasure
ancient histories of pain.
Yet if we are bold,
love strikes away the chains of fear
from our souls.

We are weaned from our timidity
In the flush of love's light
we dare be brave
And suddenly we see
that love costs all we are
and will ever be.
Yet it is only love
which sets us free.

SICK

2009-11-16T09:33:00.000-08:00

Last night was not a sleeping-in-a-delicious-pillow-cushioned-wonderland type of night. It was the it's-so-hot-in-here-that-my-sheets-are-suffocating-me-and-I-can't-breathe-yet-my-nose-won't-stop-running-night. This morning I have almost gone through a box of Kleenex and it looks as though I need to hit up the store for more on the way home too. Ugh, the cold is not my friend. Sick and tired really do go together. If only it was the weekend and I could sleep this off...

Sick

by Shel Silverstein
"I cannot go to school today,"
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
"I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox
And there's one more--that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut--my eyes are blue--
It might be Instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke--
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in,
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb.
I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There is a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is--what?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is. . .Saturday?
G'bye, I'm going out to play!"

Bridal shower for Gibbs

2009-11-15T14:33:00.000-08:00

Last night I was lucky enough to help throw a loved friend a bridal shower. Emily Gibbs is one of the coolest girls that I have ever met. She has helped me through some really hard times and she is always dependable when I need a shoulder to cry on. She is also always known to make you laugh, even when you think it impossible.

Yesterday a few friends got together and played games and went to dinner. Everything went smoothly and there was a bunch of laughs.

The thing that I really wanted to blog about was the fact that she went to the temple and took out her endowments. She is such a strong example of a women of faith. She really has been such a stepping stone in my spiritual progression. I am so proud of her. I am so grateful for her guidance and her completely kind heart.

I know that this is a really short post, but I wanted her to know how much I love her and how blessed I feel that she is my Friend.

Lone Star Tacos

2009-11-14T01:19:00.001-08:00

I eat out a lot, like an embarrassing amount of time a week. There is always something that sounds good to eat but it's basically all the same. I actually found a place that is worth blogging about....TA DA... Lone Star Tacos in Fort Union. Mmmmm.

This place had a ton of selection (even if they had barely any seats) in delicious food from all types of burritos to tacos to tamales. Everything that I tried was freaking amazing. I really want to go back soon so I can try some more of their super yummy food.

I love veggies!! I normally order the veggie omelet whenever I go out to breakfast, I always eat the yummy veggies on starter (even though I think there there for decoration), and I'm even know to order the veggie sandwich or burger on a whim. Looking at Lone Star's menu I saw to complete delight a veggie burrito. It was perfection in a tortilla shell. This little restaurant has just made my favorites list!!

Warning: Parking and seating is not always available. Park in the lot next to the restaurant and order your food to go if you must, either way try it!!

Nanas up there!

2009-11-13T09:35:00.000-08:00

Yesterday it was my Mother's 61st birthday. My sisters and I went to The Cracker Barrel to celebrate on her behalf. I remember food always being around at every event at my house. Birthdays, holidays, parties, ward activities, and even simple game nights around the kitchen table.

My mom loved food, but she was also very particular about how she made or ordered it;

One lemon for her ice water, no more, no less. Ice to the brim of the glass. No seasoning. No pepper. No flavoring. Place it on the side. Only a small tiny little bitty slice. Don't make it hot. Make it soggy. These need to be softer. Add brown sugar to the marinara. Put sugar on it. Don't add Cinnamon. Use butter. Add a can of Veg-all. Sort gummys by color, eat in pairs. Put string cheese bits in Buggles. Put a Kraft single on there. Serve toast when it's hot. Two spoons of sugar to a mug of herbal tea. De-seed the cucumbers. Make mine medium well. If it's pink send it back. More dumplings. One of each dessert.

At The Cracker Barrel my mom would always order the catfish platter with no seasoning, a side of dumplings, a side of apples, and a vegetable. She would eat biscuits before dinner and ignored the corn muffins. One slice of lemon was in her ice water. Apple cobbler and ice cream to go. She would treat all. There was always laughter and room for serious talk at the table.

This year we sang happy birthday to Mom, aka Nana, when the coca-cola cake was served. It was a nice moment to share. Immediately after the song, my nephew Trevor pointed upward and exclaimed, "Nana's up there!!" We all were silent. "I see Nana's up there." He repeated. We all look to where he was pointing. "I see the Nana's."

London caught on first, "Oh, there is a crate of bananas hanging from the ceiling."

Team Hess!!

2009-11-11T20:30:00.000-08:00

I'm sending a shout out to my sister Lera and her amazing blog!! We are both doing the November goal in the blog world and we're trying to post once a day. Today has been a really busy day for me and I really needed a break. Luckily Lera has provided you all with delicious stories on her page. Lera was the one that really catapulted me into writing, into poetry, in reading, and in blogging. I love this poem that she wrote, I'm pretty sure her muse was her baby boy Palmer. I love Lera so much and try to follow in her foot steps. Lera is a beautiful, kind, and one extremely talented lady. I really hope that one day I can be as cool as my big sister.

Mice, centipedes, and cockroaches

2009-11-10T07:19:00.000-08:00

Ugh!! Can I just say Ugh!!! I cannot post a picture with this post. I tried and I just can't.

I have lived in some pretty crazy places. I’ve lived in a home that was a mouse hot spot. The house was next to an enormous field, a log pile, and the home itself was not winterized. Have you ever seen Ratatouille- the beginning scene when all of the rats fall out of the ceiling? Well, this home was Mousatouille. There were mice on the floors, in the walls, down the stairs, in the tub, in the cupboards and yes, once in my shoe.

I rent a partial basement currently and I really love it here. But the pest that invades this basement is centipedes. Man do they give me the heebie-jeebies!! There thick long armored bodies are enough to give me goose bumps. I hate them. I hate killing them even more. I’m pretty sure I’m paying an exterminator next spring to take care of them. They love slithering around my bathroom in the summer time. They have been in my blinds, in the tub, on the ceiling, in the faucet, and creepily in my shoes.

I once lived in an apartment and I roomed with the manager of these said apartments. We needed to moved into one that needed fixing up. The former tenants were what I call... disgusting. They never cleaned their home. Never! Somehow a cockroach found out and decided to live there. The cockroach than brought its 300 offspring to the house. Then that offspring brought their 90,000 and so forth. We hired exterminators that specialized in getting rid of these horrible things. They were everywhere. The worst was when we would vacuum. Normally I like the crispy crunches the vacuum vortex creates when cleaning, but this, not so much. "We just found a family reunion", my roomy would announce over an overly loud vacuuming. They were on the curtains, in my bed, on my toothbrush, in my towels, and yes, in my shoes.

These have all been killed with poison, traps, toilet paper, wooden spoons, and you guess it, even my shoes. But alas, the pests always return in some form or another.

Cruel jokes and awkward situations

2009-11-09T16:01:00.000-08:00

A few months ago I was dying (no pun intended) my friend Emily’s hair and the following conversation happened:

Me: Are you wearing a shirt you can get dirty?
Emily: Well, It’s my dead Grandpa’s shirt
We both laugh.
Emily: I’m serious.
We both laugh harder
Me: Oh… well can it get dirty?
Emily: Yeah, it’s old. Are you ok if your shirt gets dirty?
Me: Umm, actually this shirt was my mom’s.
We both laugh.
Me: I’m serious.
We both laugh harder!!
Emily: Did you want to change?
Me: No, it’s old.

Today at work my friend Chelsey was talking about how her dad gave her his ipod because hers was stolen.

Me: Wow, I wish I had a dad that wanted to give me an ipod.
Emily: I wish I had a dad.
We both laugh.
Chelsey: That is NOT funny.
Me and Emily: Yes, it is!
Chelsey: No it’s not, stop laughing.
Me: You know, Emily and I are two girls, but if you put us together you get one orphan!!
We both laugh harder.
Chelsey: Stop laughing, you guys - it’s sad!

Oh, life and its ridiculousness makes you crazy. Sometimes I cry, sometimes I laugh, sometimes my laughter turns into crying, and sometimes my crying into laughing.

Superman wears Jack Bauer jammies...

2009-11-07T18:37:00.000-08:00

Is there a pill that can make me more like a girl? Because seriously I am not a normal girl when it comes to media, I love movies that get brutal. I love violence!! I love gore!! I love watching shoot ‘em up movies with no plot!!

But there is only one television show that makes all the others look like little pansy sitcoms.
24!!

Oh, Jack Bauer, I love you.

Thank you for bringing back the crazy, over imaginative ways to take down a bad guy.

“You probably don’t think I could force this towel down your throat, but trust me I can. All the way. Except that I’d hold onto this little bit at the end. When your stomach starts to digest the towel, I pull it out. Taking your stomach lining with it. Most people probably take about a week to die. It’s very painful.” – Jack Bauer

Thank you for bringing some awesome conversations to my families’ dinner table. Even during other movies my family and I state, and I quote, "Where is Jack Bauer...?" Because we know that you can take care of business.

“Officer, this guy is not waiting around for me… so you better shoot me or help me but decide now!” -JB

Thank you for bringing blood and guts to the small screen.

“Say it again! Or I’ll break your other wrist!” –JB

Thank you for showing everyone what we need in our country.

“David Palmer was a great man and a great president.”

Ok, that one was cheesy, but I love David Palmer and he need to be mentioned.

Jack, last but not least, thank you for wearing the super tight shirts and pants that show off your action hero body!! Ok, so maybe I still am a girl…

Why are you so angry??

2009-11-07T17:30:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I dedicated my post to Shannon. I told her about it and the first thing that came out of her mouth was yelled, "What!! What is it about! What did you do?". I was suprised by the annoyance that shot from her mouth. I coaxed her to the computer room to read it.

While the computer was loading she said, "Is this another one of your weird poetry things that I won't understand?!". I said "No, it's a letter."

Then she read it and criticed what I wrote. "That isn't true" and "WWWWhat??" and "That's not what happened!"

Then came the photo at the bottom of my post. The reaction that came from her should have been expected, but low and behold, again I was surprised.

"Why did you put up that picture? You know that I hate it. You should have used one that I approved of! Our teeth look awful in this photo." My reply, "ummm, I love that picture, it's our best friend picture. Why are you so angry??"

"Because I hate it," she said "look how yellow my teeth are!!"

My reply to all of this was "I'm so blogging about your reaction tomorrow. Her reply was "Fine, then do it."

So to follow through on my threat, >:), I posted it. Here you go Fanny. Bwa ha ha ha.

xo. papaya.

ps. I hope you like this "approved" photo better.

pps. I'm still not removing the other one.

ppps. Fanny, you're a pain in my fanny.

My Fanny

2009-11-06T16:28:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I'm not really going to blog about my bottom...

My best Friend Shannon received the nick name fanny after buying and wearing a fanny pack to her job for about a year. This might not be so funny to you, but I find it hi-larious. She worked with grade school children and it was convenient for her. But I still made fun of the fanny pack and it soon lead to a nick name Shanny Fanny and then simply to Fanny.

6 is Fanny's favorite number. So today on November 6th and my 6th post I dedicate it to her.

My Dearest Fanny,

There really aren't words to tell you how much I value your friendship. There have been many times that both of us didn't really understand why we were Friends, but so many more that prove why we were.

I'm so grateful for your testimony of the gospel and your complete dedication to try to live every aspect rightly. Your truly are such a strong women and a fierce enemy to the evils of this world. I will never be able to thank you enough for helping me come into the life of the gospel. With out it I would still be lost and still feel so completely directionless. I might have been "a bad example" for you during the school years but it was nice to have some one love me no matter what path I was on. I'm glad that we both were able to figure out who we are and stand up for ourselves in a fallen world.

I'm grateful for your kindness and service. It's embarrassing to have to ask to borrow money to pay for college tuition or to have you carry my laundry because I hurt my back, but you do it. You really are a lady of service. Even your job, taking care of medically challenged people never seems to get you down. You are here to serve and I want you to know that it doesn't go unnoticed.

I'm also very grateful for your cynical humor and slightly crazy humor. I definitely have a negative side and sometimes I joke darkly. You get it, every time. You never judge me for having sad, crazy, or rude times. You just stay and wade it out.

You consistency to always be there is something that I value above all. I really hope that our friendships just gets better and stronger. I love you so much!!

xo-Papaya

Manly Musical Muses

2009-11-05T13:15:00.000-08:00

I'm extremely stubborn...I know, that's a shocker. And one thing that I will never budge on is my taste in music. I love great music. There is no lukewarm feelings for music. To me music is either loved or hated. I hate country. I hate pop. I hate bubblegum punk. I hate rap. I love rock. I love alternative. I love jazz. I love the oldies. I love indie.

It's hard for me to have a favorite band when there is such amazing talent, such as The Beatles, Incubus, and Muse.

Today I thought I would talk about my music boyfriends. The men in my lyrical life that I could never live with out. And so for my 5th post in November I shall post a top 5 of my musical men.

1.- John Lennon- The Beatles

He is the most creative lyricist I've ever heard. The rhythm of his music completely moves me. John Lennon is the icon of peace in the music world- which exactly what his songs bring into my life.

2. Matthew Bellamy- MuseThis dude can sing any girl into a trance. His voice jumps around with a piano in perfect control. From his bass devilishness to his sweet and enticing falsetto...I melt. There is no way to just sing along with Muse, you literally have to party with Muse. Please listen to the song Feeling Good...delicious.

3. Brandon Boyd- Incubus MMmmmmm. Is what needs to be said first and foremost. But after the MmmmMMMmm feeling you can hear a gorgeous voice. A strong one that flows with any instrument that Brandon can get his hands on. His voice brings you into a hypnotic dreamworld. Mmmm.

4. Gary Lightbody- Snow Patrol

Not only is Gary an amazing singer, but he is extremely easy to relate to . His vocal talent and lyrics make everyone at ease. I've never been in love, not the forever kind, but when I listen to his songs it's easy to feel as though I am. He has such a soft voice, but strong enough to never lose his ground next to killer guitar solos and heavy drum patterns. I love the Gary!!

.5 Frank Sinatra-

Frank is a mix of jazz and class. His amazing voice is original and can never be replaced. He really opened my eyes to the world of music. His golden vocals are smooth and enchanting. If you could ever imagine yourself in a dream, his music would play in the background. I remember the first time I heard him sing Fly Me to the Moon- it was life changing. "Fill my heart with song, let me sing forever more."

Christmas lights

2009-11-05T07:22:00.000-08:00

Christmas lights are starting to be hung!! Which is a smart thing to do now while the weather is still good. I love Christmas lights. I really enjoy going down the Christmas story drive and taking a quick ride down the narrow lane of Winder street. The lights are beautiful.

There are some that are embarrassing. Some that are too much. There is a house in my old neighborhood that has what I call "Lego Lights". Nothing is measured. The colors of the lights are all primary colors and run along the whole roof top. Once one color ends, another is added. It's mismatched and looks as the residents just threw boxes of lights on the top of their home. Giving the complete illusion of a Lego house.

Remember in Christmas Vacation when Clark Griswold fails at lighting up the house with Christmas lights at the "lighting ceremony" in front of the entire family? Well from that moment comes one of the best quotes from the Griswold family-in my opinion.

Frances: Talk about pissing your money away. I hope you kids see what a silly waste of resources this was.

Audrey: He worked really hard, Grandma.

Art: So do washing machines.

There are those that work hard on their Christmas lights and those that just throw anything that flashes on their house. I would like to thank Failblog.org for the following picture to show the difference in those that care and those that don't.

"Work is a necessary evil to be avoided." -Mark Twain

2009-11-04T13:08:00.000-08:00

Oh, the ways work can impact our lives. I have many jobs that have all been in customer service. And each job has just been a horse of a different color. I'm nice to the customer. They get what they want. I'm mean to the customer. They get what they want from someone else. Sometimes I cry or yell or throw things - it doesn't matter. Every customer service job is the same. It always ends in kissing some body's rear end - then they get what they want.

Luckily, I have really enjoyed some of my jobs. I have worked with amazing people. I have had some life changing experiences.

In a really geeky show that I love (cough) Firefly (cough) there is a man that is talking about his job and the way it makes him act. Then he finds out later in the show that he took his job because of the way he already was.

I think everyone should think really think about this. We are all in work that is about us in some way. It can propel our personality to be stronger more defined. It allows us to learn more about ourselves. Such as, "I like doing this" or "There isn't enough money in the world to make me do that again"

Looking back on my personal job trek, I find myself surprised by the way it's helped me become who I am today. Not that I didn't have my personality before them but they helped me become more defined.

Nanny- I love children. I want to be a mother. I feel compassionate. I'm impatient. I enjoy reading stories. I think parents should take a stand and grow up. I think that children learn by example. I'm goofy. I care about hygiene and germs. I love toys. I laugh. I like to cook. Cleaning up after someone else is exhausting.

The E Center Box Office- I like people. I love going to concerts. I love getting discounts. I like noise. I am loud. I am generous. I am computer savvy. I like to party. I hate public restrooms

Hollywood Connections- Kids are fun to entertain. Kids never listen. I hate cleaning bathrooms. I want a manager that knows more than me. I want to learn. I want to play games. I hate carnival music.

Shopko- I love to shop. I love Black Friday. I want to buy everything that I don't need. I spend a lot of money on food. I love black pants. Magazines are amazing. I like to work in the garden. I'm protective of lost children. I'm a flirt.

Blockbuster- I am a movie junkie. I love to talk about media. Actor gossip is entertaining to me. I love knowing movie endings before others see them. I love trailers. I am a marathon women. I think stay at home dates are the best. People in movie stores are artistic. I'm a quoter. I love the night life.

SLCC Cosmetology- I love fashion. I am creative. I'm good at measurements. I like to study. I enjoy social gatherings. I like to fold warm laundry. I love the sound of water. I like to complement others. I like to do things right the first time. I think vanity is ugly.

Seagull Book and Tape- I'm a book worm. I give opinions to others. I help plan. I know how to decorate. I love talk tapes. I want to be spiritually feed. I love doctrine. I think old women are funny. I love having my books signed. I love hearing about peoples reading experiences.

Kohl's- I wear nice perfume. I hate balancing. I'm annoyed by teenage boys. I'm not a work-a-holic. I worry about stupid details.

FedEx Systems- I'm not a telephone talker. I like things to be taken care of. I like people that own up to their responsibilities. I'm very loud. I love photos of Friends and family. I keep mementos. I'm a rude driver. I like to type. I hate being micromanaged. I love having a fixed schedule. I like knowing where I stand.

Writer- I get stumped easily. I like to go on rampages. I like alone time. I'm in control. I love wit. I like to be poetic. I love to have crazy ideas. I like being original.

(OK, so I've never been paid to write, but I'm still a writer. My other jobs might have made my personality stronger but I found myself in writing.)

NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month)

2009-11-04T07:22:00.001-08:00

This November is National Blog Month. There is a goal for bloggers everywhere to post once a day to help make the Internet a happier place. As you can tell by my blog history, I've never even been close to this. In fact I've already failed. You see, I didn't blog on November 1st or 2nd. But just because I'm already behind doesn't mean that I'm not going to try.

Today I post my top ten November goals.

1. Get all cards/games/prizes/food prepared for Emily’s bridal shower on November 14th.
2. November 19th, go to Events by Alice and see New Moon.
3. Post a blog for each day of NOVEMBER-Yikes!!!
4. Make rolls and stuffing for November 26th, Thanksgiving.
5. Attend church every Sunday in nOvEMbeR.
6. In November I want my prayer and scripture reading quality to improve by leaps and bounds.
7. november 12th, celebrate my late Mother’s 61st birthday with my sisters.
8. All of my nOVEMBEr bills paid on time and car fixed… oy vey!!
9. De-junk through all of my things and organize a huge November DI run.
10. Work on a chapter in my book that is called “November”.

The many emotions of Winter

2009-11-03T16:03:00.000-08:00

Last week it snowed for the first time near my house. I wanted to blog that day, but it turned out to be a very busy one.

So on a non snowy day, I blog. There are many feelings that surround me in the Winter season. I actually hate snow and ice and all of the horrible things a winter storm brings. However, I do love the holidays.

I love getting together with my family and doing festive things. I love baking for loved ones. I love seeing the clearances on fall clothes. I love the mayhem of Black Friday and the crazy people (including me) that shop it. I love that night time comes early. I love that one day we all get an extra hour of sleep. I thrive for clear night sky's and thin air that slides the whole way into your lungs. I love seeing little kids in huge coats. I love seeing old women in ridiculous home made hats.

Here is a list of my Winter emotions.

ANNOYED- Feeling random clumps of snow in my shoes, on my car seat, down the back of my shirt, in my hair, and in my purse. I hate when dirty gutter rain falls on my face and on my arms as I enter under the porch shelter - thinking I would be safe from the elements as I enter the house.

TIRED- I haven't had shelter over my car as long as I can remember. This leaves the need to wake up 30 minutes early to scrape and heat up the car.

HURT- Ow! I fell and really hurt my backside/knees/palms. I wish I wasn't so clumsy. I've always been envious of the kids that run and slide on the snow. Who needs ski's when you have grace.

EMBARRASSED- I fell again.

STRESSED- Shopping for those I love, trying to find the perfect thing for each individual person.

HUMBLED- The festival of trees is always one of my favorite nights of the year. There are so many of the trees that touch my heart or remind me of things I'm grateful for.

HAPPY- I love lights on houses and Christmas music in the stores and cars.

ENTERTAINED- Shopping for those I love, trying to find the perfect thing for each individual person.

GRATEFUL- To think about the birth of Christ and be able to celebrate. “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.”

POETIC- When the sky is a willing mirror reflecting a white hue from the fallen snow, lighting every night with a glow. It looks like moon light found a way to never be shadowed. Every year of my adult life I choose a night and take a midnight walk. I love the complete silence of crisp air. The silhouettes of dark blue trees line my path as I enjoy the ambiance. My skin, a perfect alabaster.

Rie reads.

2009-10-30T13:03:00.000-07:00

There is nothing like an amazing read! I just wanted to post some books that I've read and enjoyed.

I'm not going to over kill The Hunger Games and Catching Fire...this time. Please read them anyways.

First up would be The Mortal Instruments series. This was surprisingly a great read. I've picked it up in the good old Barnes and Nobles many of times but I always put it back before I got to the check out. I'm really glad that a friend bought it on a whim. (She said the cover looked nice- I agree.) The series includes City of Bones, City of Ash, and City of Glass. These are super easy to read since they are youth readers.

The next would be Wuthering Heights. I've read it before but I really wanted to freshen up on the dark romance between Heathcliff and Cathy. Oh how I hate Cathy!! This book is an eclectic collection of types of love and hate. I had a friend at work ask me what the book was about - I said that it was Twilight, but Edward and Bella don't get together. We both hate Bella so she read it that week.

I finally finished Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. Between my love of Jane Austen and my love for morbid things this was a perfect match. Reading this one is a no-brainer. I'm funny. I'm super excited for Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters that will come out in September.

50% off your entire purchace @ Payless

2009-10-29T10:20:00.000-07:00

I'm not a big fan of Oprah, in fact she really annoys me. But today she seems to be trying to impress me.

Last night London and I were talking about our happy dreams. I said how I love the dreams where I find mega cheap perfect fitting shoes. And sadly, I didn't have the dream, but today I found something that will help bring it to reality.

If you go to this website below you can print off a 50% off you entire purchase coupon at Payless Shoe Store. I thought it was a really sweet deal. It starts today and ends tomorrow.

OK Oprah, today you were cool....

Hope you enjoy the coupon like I will!!

http://www.oprah.com/article/oprahshow/20091016-tows-payless

convenient problem

2009-09-30T09:49:00.000-07:00

Tuesday I got a flat tire and it cost $100 to fix. And really, that is not too shabby. It could have been a lot worse.

My car was fine besides the flat, I got to work on time, I will get paid before I go to New York (so I still will have some $$ to fall back on), No one got hurt, and I had nothing to do that night so no plans were wrecked. I even had some friends from work that helped me put on a spare at lunch time. Who knew that there was something like a convenient flat tire.

why!!!?!?!?!???!

2009-09-28T07:36:00.001-07:00

The first day of fall.

2009-09-22T14:47:00.000-07:00

Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns.

-George Eliot

'Rieting time' mind mapping

2009-09-16T22:38:00.000-07:00

OK kittens, It's been forever since I've had a rieting time post and I thought I would share something that I haven't yet. It was from a lesson that my dear sister Lera taught our little group. We had a lesson on mind mapping.

What is mind mapping you say? Well it can be anything really. But here's an example.

Rules of mind mapping:
Take a piece of paper and draw a rectangle in the center of the page. (or a circle, heart, cloud, who cares.)
Inside the shape write the name of the topic that you want to mind map.
Then draw branches from that center to write about supporting ideas or contradicting ones.
Feel free to branch off of those lines and ask questions or place thoughts.
As each idea materializes your page will start to look like a smashed mutated spider.

-Mind Maps are personal records of thought processes and are normally kept private.
But not this time….

Lera had us write about “our personal sanctuary” as the center thought. Mine was the shower. Truthfully if I would have thought more about it I would have done something more creative or spiritual; but it’s my mind map, so it was neither.

We had branches on our mind map that had specific questions. Mine had inquiries such as; when do you go there, what it looks like, what you see, how does it feel, etc.

So without further delay, here it is.

My Sanctuary

Hidden from my stresses I draw the curtain
Cool water slowly heats up, warming my heart
Thick wet blankets cover over my hair
And drops kiss down my tired eyes
Delicate bubbles slide down my arms unharmed
I watch as they are carried away in the continues current
Steam billows slowly in and out of my lungs
Making each breath smoother, deeper
Muscles tender under gentle trickles
Sheets of liquid hug onto the curves of my legs
My back stroked fluidly with calm touches
Clean and unbroken suds drain with my troubles
I wrap myself in a soft flexible cocoon
Knowing I can move on safe and free

my mirror can take time to dry its face

absolutely wonderful blessings-- top 5

2009-09-14T21:21:00.000-07:00

Today I thought that I would say the top 5 things that I am very grateful for!! Things that really had a major impact on me today.

1. I am grateful for my nephew Palmer and for his super stinkin' cute smiles and breathy laughs that he shares with me every time that I see him. Even when it's storming like a bugger and I forgot to send some important emails at work. He makes life great.

2. I'm grateful for the gospel in my life. I am not perfect, but it is.

3. I'm grateful for being able to have a really nice bed to sleep on tonight. The overly large taco in my own room has not been comfy friend as of late.

4. I am grateful for being able to look through photos of a trip that I took almost one year ago to Forks, WA. I was able to remember how fun it was and they have gotten me super excited for my next trip. New York, here I come.

5. I am grateful for being able to have a ton of random cosmetology school leftovers. Even though I have decided against doing hair as a profession, I have found that time and time again those products can be a life saver. Whether it is a bottle of hair dye, 10 feet of cotton string, nail stickers, or even 10 lbs of bobby pins, they have always come in handy.

Lights...book...action. Take two.

2009-09-06T21:18:00.000-07:00

This January I finished a book called the Hunger Games written by Suzanne Collins. It was one of the best books I've ever read and it quickly become a favorite. I wrote a post completely dedicated to the novel. I begged for people to read it...Did you?

You guys, no joke, Suzanne Collins is a great writer. I thought I could never again find a book that completely saturated my imagination with such creativity and surreal environments after I read The Hunger Games.

Until this morning when I finished the sequel called Catching Fire. It was amazing!

I have never read a book with such raw and powerful emotions. It brings me into new world where I felt my own survival instincts were being tested along side the characters. I wanted to fight with them. I want to defend them.

Instead I'm left to defend the books.

Please, please, please read them. Read them and then tell me about it. Read them and then thank yourself for not wasting your time on just another mediocre book.

Spiders, spiders everywhere!

2009-08-19T17:33:00.000-07:00

That is it!! I have officially had it with the bugs. I seriously have seen them everywhere in this basement. They are on the carpet, on my tv, in the bathtub, between the shower curtains, on the walls, on my sock, all over my closet, and yes, thrice in my bed. Ugh!

I love the house I live in. The layout is beautiful, the roomys are great, and the AC runs all year. But the basement bugs have got to go.

I read online that if you read learn more about your fears, you might be able to think of them more logically than what you were believing before.

So I pulled up pictures and articles about the furry little creepers. It didn't help. I actually started to dream about the pictures and even worse; I had a dream about spiders coming out of my computer while I was blogging. Luckily, it was only a dream and no spiders have appeared during this post.

Sariah's growing up

2009-08-10T22:44:00.000-07:00

This post is dedicated to the girl that if full of crazy imagination and random passions. The girl I've almost forgotten.

I have not been my normal self. I'm lackadaisical and extremely unmotivated to do almost anything. I feel as though all I do now is work and sleep, work and watch TV, work and shower - all not exciting.

This week I will be working my full-time job at FedEx and spend most of the nights in the Customer Service box at Kohl's.
This week my TV broke and seriously, I cried a bit.
This week I started to have insomnia, again.

I've been doing nothing since I've been working the two jobs. My social life is nonexistent and it seems as though late night TV has become my best and most dependable friend.

I'm not happy with this uneventful life.

I have the best personality to find the worst in any situation. I am a pure pessimist. I have depression and I use it as a crutch whenever I can; I cry whenever there is a reason to, I'm starting to avoid social gatherings full of people I love, I seem to punish myself for things I can't control, I don't spend enough time with my friends and family, I never even get ready for the day...

We live in a world where it is socially acceptable to constantly put yourself down. I've accepted it full hearted and I've been living a life that isn't me.

ENOUGH ALREADY!

Today I've decided I need to find happiness and bring it back in my life. I deserve it and it's time for me to start living the right way.

I am GIRLY I am a DANCER I love my FRIENDS I'm an AUNTIE
I am FREE I am LOVED I am SPIRITED I SING I have FAMILY

I'm a WRITER
I am LOUD I am Hopeful I am TALENTED I have STYLE I get FREAKY

Happiness, please help me find you. Because this girl, right here, needs you.

YARD SALE!!

2009-07-29T07:27:00.000-07:00

I stole this from my sister's post;
"
We are having a huge multifamily yard sale this Saturday from 8:00 am - noon at 4976 West Tolin Circle (3145 South). We have finally gone through the backroom which was chuck full of my parents' leftovers. It was the craftroom, among other things, so we have TONS of scrapbooking/crafting supplies that we just want to get rid of, and consequently are dirt cheap. I'm talking about $2.00 for an entire album of stickers and diecuts (some sheets alone which were worth $5.00 to begin with) and for a two foot long tote of paper. We also combined my scrapbook room with the office so I had to limit the supplies of my own that I kept. We also have a lot of books, Cds, DVDs, toys, games, electronics, kitchen supplies and furniture (TV stands, king size mattress set, kitchen table, coffee table, desks, book shelves, a plush rocking chair, etc.) from us and the other families involved."

Lera is going to have a ton of stuff!!! And it's all very cheap. I'm also in on this sale, I have a ton that needs to go as well. So does my sister London. So does Lera's mother-in-law.

Please come and support us in getting rid of our old treasures.

The good, the bad, and the ugly...

2009-07-26T22:17:00.000-07:00

Our family is having one gigantic yard sale this coming Saturday morning. Right now I am frantically trying to get my side of items priced and organized...it's not really happening for me. Right now I'm thoroughly distracted by Chuck Season 1-that Lera bought me for my birthday. I'm also freaking out a little bit about a creepy wolf spider that just ran over my foot and bit my toe while I was tagging old VHS movies. (As info, it actually bit my stub. And let's face it nothing is going to get diseased and fall off there...)

So instead of stressing out about what to get rid of and what to keep or nasty face spiders that are lurking in the cavernous shelves in my room, I'm blogging.

I'm going to blog about some of the good, the bad, and the so ugly it's embarrassing that I used to own this items. Here we go. Try to figure out which ones I'm embarrassed about...

Spice World the Movie
Mighty Morphin Power Rangers - the movie
LDS romance fiction novels
A clock I bought when I moved in (two years ago) and still haven't hung
High School Musical Soundtrack
Saturday's Warriors - movie and soundtrack
Mystery Men
Peter Pan - and every other Disney VHS under the sun
Under cover blues
Sonic the Hedgehog - the game
Street Fighter - the movie
Sister Act 1&2...
A self help book called; Why Men Love Bitches
Better Off Dead
The Mirror Has Two Faces
Walmart DVD special on Hairspray
Dickie Roberts-Former Childhood star
necklaces that don't fit me right
Caberet
Little Mermaid soundtrack
Daisy Chainsaw CD
A very old Star Wars VHS set... whimper

Wierd Monday

2009-07-07T09:37:00.000-07:00

10 times I pushed the snooze button on my alarm clock
10 minutes to find my debit card and fill up my gas tank
10 strange looks from people because I forgot to brush my hair
9 times I tried to check my voice mail, with the wrong pass word
9 tissues I went through on the way to work
8 emails in my inbox - all big issues to work on today
8 hours until my shift was over
8 people on my row with better lunches than me
8 times I've scanned my work badge
7 pieces of gum
7 minutes before my next job
6 hours of my night shift
6 items with a weird liquid on them that got on my hands while returning them
6 radio stations I flipped through trying to find something not Nickel Back - ahhh!
5 spiders I've killed today - ahhhhhhhh!!!
5 o'clock rush hour drive
5 super hot men that had a wedding ring
5 creepy stinky men that didn't
4 moments I thought 'why me'
4 moments I thought 'you did this to yourself'
3 tooth brush moments of spilling toothpaste on my shirt
3 birthday gifts bought
3 times I thought I lost my keys
3 times I lost my mind
2 sisters that keep me going through the hard times
2 swollen ankles
2 cups of water to instant mash potatoes for lunch... sick
2 times I went to charge my phone and forgot why I was there
2 showers because I forgot to wash my hair the first time - poor hair
2 towel dries
1 dead cell phone battery
1 tired girl
1 alarm clock set for tomorrow

Garfield gone crazy

2009-07-07T06:47:00.000-07:00

When Lera and I were younger, we went to the library - a lot. Our mom told us that we were allowed to check out 20 books at a time or 10 movies. Lera and I used to have reading competitions.

Lera started out giving me the advantage of having about 1,000 pages less to read than her, I won most of the time. Then it went to 800, 500 and then 200 pages. Finally we started doing the same amount. It was neck and neck with our winnings. (Or maybe she won most of the time.)

My books were always so much easier to read then hers. She would read novels about vampires, school criteria, and LDS fiction, I would read goosebumps and Ender's Game...repetitively.

I also loved Garfield comics. I seriously think that I have read every Garfield comic book in that library. It didn't count toward the competitions, but I still loved them.

Its been about 12 years or so since I've read one and then I came across these from a friend at work.

Garfield Minus Garfield.

They have taken Garfield out of the strips. And it makes John look completely crazy. You should google them and have a laugh.

Where have I been??

2009-07-06T09:41:00.001-07:00

I haven't been blogging. The reason why is obvious. I'm tired.

I have been trying unsuccessfully to get out of debt and the thought occurred to me, If I'm not spending less, I've got to make more. Alas, I got a second job.

I'm now working at Kohl's in customer service. It's a really easy fun job. I like the people I work with and I get a sweet discount. (Which I still haven't used yet - and I'm amazed.)

Even though I'm grateful for the second income, the hours are starting to add up. They take a hold of my social life, my sleeping patterns, and worst of all my dinners. Missing out on food is unacceptable.

But doing this I've realized that sleep does come before food and paying off debt does beat a wicked sweet discount on clearance items.

The plus signs of having no life...
I'm down a few pounds, I have one credit card paid off, I have a savings account that is growing weekly, and I've been sleeping instead of watching Bones or Gossip girl until 3 AM.

Last week I worked 73 hours. Same this week. Same next.

I'm happy. I'm tired. I'm blogging.

Up do mania!!

2009-05-31T10:54:00.000-07:00

My Friend Emily got married yesterday, and I couldn't be more happy for her. Emily and her hubby Aaron make one excellent couple. My best wishes go to the newly weds!!

For her wedding gift I gave her the present of doing her bridal updo. She asked me if I would be willing to do her girls hair. (She has three beautiful daughters.) I told her that I would love to help out. I did a practice updo on her youngest daughter to show her an example of barrel curls, which she loved.

Emily wanted a french twist with everything up. She has a above the shoulder A-line cut, but somehow we got it all up. She said that she was very happy with the look but she wanted to see what it would look like all down. We made another updo practice appointment.

Upon arriving Emily said that she wanted to do a half up half down updo. I curled and pined and left the bottom of her hair down. We put in the veil and She knew exactly what she wanted. She wanted it all up, but curly.

Her bridals were the coming Saturday, and luckily everything worked out just fine. She looked just like a princess!!

Later that week I heard that saying that I would do the "girls" hair meant the bridesmaids. All 6.

Ha aha haha hah ah BAH. No.

There was no way for me to do 6 bridesmaid's up dos plus the brides. I know my limits and this was quit beyond mine. Luckily I have a very great friend named Jenn. She had just stopped her Saturday job at a barber shop and offered to do three of the up dos, for only 10 bucks per girl.

(Jenn I freakin' love you and I'm so grateful for your support in everything over the past 7 years!!)

Emily wanted everyone with the same hairstyle and I think me and Jenn worked really well together. She did Emily's girls hair and I did the bride and the Bridesmaids. Even though they all looked beautiful before the up dos, and they all looked just like the princesses that they are after them.

With it being the day after the wedding; all of 470 bobby pins taken out of their hair, 7 pounds of product washed off their curls, the dresses peeled off, and the high heel stilettos wrenched off - I think everyone thought it was a magical day. I'm so glad that everything worked out.

(I'm going to blog about the reception too. London, my oldest sister, was over it and it looked absolutely perfect.)

Team wolf pack...

2009-05-21T12:43:00.000-07:00

Yumm, how old do you have to be to become a cougar? Because I feel like one.

The official New Moon poster.

2009-05-19T08:03:00.000-07:00

I love it. Just saying.

1 - 10

2009-05-15T20:46:00.000-07:00

If you read this blog I challenge you to do this on yours. What to do is count 1 -10 and name random things about you. I saw this on a friends blog and I thought this looked fun. You can pick any list of favorites that you want to list.
#1 you name 1 item, #2 you name 2 things, # 3 you name 3 items, and so forth.

#1- favorite movie - Big Fish

#2- favorite color - Brown, White

#3- favorite bands - Muse, Incubus, Beatles

#4- favorite foods - Pizza, salads, sandwiches, sushi

#5- favorite animals - camels, owls, polar bears, cats, deer

#6- favorite songs- hallelujah, black bird, imagine, hey jude, pardon me, Stockholm syndrome

#7- favorite restaurants- MiMi's Cafe, La Luna, Cafe Rio, Teppan Yaki, Olive Garden, Cheesecake Factory, happy sumo

#8- favorite actors- Ewan Mcgregor, Johnny Depp, James Mcavoy, Will Smith, Kevin Spacey, Ian Mcklellan, Heath Ledger, George Clooney

#9- favorite places to go- Barnes and Noble, Port Angeles, Bear Lake, Out to eat, Fat Catz, Theater, Movies, Home

#10- favorite people- London, Monte, Braedo, Trevor, Davis, Lera, Greg, Palmer, Mom, Dad

Whoo. That was not as easy as I thought it would be!! Now it's your turn.

May 10th

2009-05-12T10:15:00.000-07:00

Today I would like to focus on three very loved ladies.

The first would be my mother, Valerie. I love and miss her so much. There is nothing that I wouldn't give to be able to spend another mother's day with her.

When the Nichols' girls would celebrate mother's day we would really celebrate it. We decorated a room in the house (normally Mom's bathroom) with a fun theme. There have been the alphabet, birthday bandit, wizard of oz, and "priceless" themed mother's days amongst the many others.
I love my Mother so much and I pray that one day we can celebrate with her again.

The second loved lady is my sister London. May 10th is her birthday. I went out of town on vacation so I wasn't able to spend it with her. I'm sorry I missed it but I just wanted to wish her a very happy birthday and tell her how proud I am of the women that she is.

The third is my good bud Jenn. Her birthday is also May 10th. She was my first room mate and was a great friend in college. We've gone on some super fun trips together!! My favorite one was when we went to Washington. She is a really generous girl and one fantastic friend.

I love you all.

Naughties, Disneyland, and Mr. Spock

2009-05-11T23:06:00.000-07:00

What do these three things have in common you ask? Well, the answer is my weekend.

On Friday I went shopping for wedding dresses with my great friend Jenn. She has the wedding day set and the location, but is still missing some very important wedding items. The dress and the ring being the top two. So we decided go shopping!

Did you know that most bridle stores close at 6 and that you need to set up an appointment to try on dresses at almost every store? Nope? Me neither.
So we set up appointments and went off in search for something almost as important as the dress for the wedding day, the honeymoon night "outfit". Out of the hours spent in search of some nice looking naughties, I was the only one to buy something. (A gift for another friend's bachelorette party.)

Saturday Jenn was going to go to Disneyland with her fiance for her birthday, he got sick and there was a non-refundable hotel room and a buddy-pass plane ticket up for grabs. What was a maid of Honor to do for her beloved friend in need?

I stole his place and made the sacrifice of a Disneyland trip.

It might not have been the romantic and magical Disneyland trip that was planned for Jenn and her sweet Billy, but it was definitely a day of wicked fun times, rides, and shopping.

We were allowed to be treated like the princesses we are...

Getting back from Disneyland left me extremely happy and very sleepy. I woke up very late today to a phone call from my Dad. He wanted to take me out to Dinner and a movie. It's been a long time since I've hung out with my Dad alone and it was a really good experience. We decided to go and see star Trek.

There never was a day in my life that I would have watched Star Trek willingly. Shocker I know, because I'm such a geek, but I am completely a Star Wars geek and I didn't want to be traitor to George Lucas.

But then I heard that this movie was the start of the old series, so I wouldn't miss out on the plot and that it was being directed by JJ Abrams, who I LOVE!! Those two points still didn't get me to the theater, then I heard that the movie also had Zachary Quinto (Mmmm), I was sold.

We went and saw the new Star Trek movie and I really loved it. I didn't understand half of the jokes that were made but the plot was good, the nerds in the theater were funny, and Mr. Spock was Sci-Fi deliciously hot. (I know that Spock isn't supposed to be "hot" but trust me you'll just have to see for yourself.)

Live long and prosper Mr. hot Spock.

You've got mail.

2009-05-08T23:50:00.000-07:00

This is not just a cute movie with Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks, this is the thing that many people look forward to everyday... Their email inbox of goodies.

But not me, my friend. After working as an email jockey for almost 4 years I am tired of the inbox and it's demonic glow of black and white. I am stuck in front of a computer for 8 hours every week day and I've started to write at home too. Which means a lot of one on one time with my new HP at work and homework with my Sony Vaio.

At work alone I have 4 inboxes. That isn't including the 6 other's that I can watch when other's call in sick. At home I have 3 inboxes. Face book, My space, and Hotmail. You guys, I'm really trying my best.

Today I got a voice mail from a good friend telling me that she sent me an email and that she knew that I didn't like to go through them, and then over the phone, she said what the email was about. To me that seemed like a lot of extra work for her.

I realized that I need to get on the ball. I opened my Hotmail account and low and behold the demonic number of 983 emails in my inbox slapped me in the face. I'm really sorry but I have to say I read the one that I already heard about on the phone and then I did something I should have done forever ago. I pressed delete.

I deleted 983 emails today, and I'm pretty sure with my day at work, I can count at least an even 1,000 emails.

I'm sorry if your emails were deleted and you wanted me to read them. But it had to be done. Today was a declaration to all junk emails everywhere. You helped stop the silence to every spam, coupon, weight losing, credit card bill, ebay watch list, and face book update emails. The casualty of your email was necessary. It helped me to tell all clutter to GET LOST.

*I'm starting a new. I am going to get my email under control. I'm going to reply to my friends. The computer will not control me any longer. Today is the start of my peace treaty with inboxes across the globe.

Oh, and I'll start answering my phone too.
*If I can remember to turn it on...

Grateful for employment!!

2009-05-07T16:52:00.001-07:00

Today I got called into my bosses office - which let's face it, that is a daily occurrence. I sat down across from him and he said "I have some news to tell you. You might think it's good or bad depending on how you feel about it."

My first thought was that I might get laid off, like so many people in the world now, but that there was going to be a severance pay. This would be bad news.

My second thought would be that we wouldn't have to cut our work day by forty five minutes any more. Which would be great news.

"OK" I said.

"We are wanting everyone to work their full forty hour work week again."

I was so happy!! Bigger paychecks, I was keeping my job, and business is picking up once more. And lets be honest, a thirty six hour work week feels as long as a forty hour work week, but you get less money.

I held my fist toward my boss and waited for him to plant a rock. Which took him a little bit to long to realize what I was doing, making my action seem quite awkward, but I don't care!!

I'm working my normal shift and business is picking up for now.

Today I am beyond grateful for my job. I'm grateful for the home I have to live in. I'm grateful for the blessings of tithing.